Friday, April 17, 2009

Because life gets overwhelming sometimes..

Okay, friends.. I need your encouragement. I feel like my blog's been lacking a little lately - meaning mostly that it's veered off course from what I intended it to be.. about my writing.

I have started my next book. It's been over a month since I asked for your help and opinions on which story to write, and while I haven't worked as hard on it as I would like to have, progress has been made. I have written outlines for both stories and have the first 2 chapters or so of the winning option written (#2).

But I seem to be lacking motivation. (sick toddler, struggling with home school, too much time working out?)

And whenever I have a particularly difficult day (which happens often when you have 5 kids under 10 being cared for by two slightly mental parents..), I start feeling like I should give up. This little voice inside my head says 'What do you think you're doing? You don't have time for this.. get your head out of your ass and just focus on your family for now. You can't do it all.' But I can. I just need to manage my time better (don't we all??). No, I don't need to finish the whole book in 30 days, but I know that I'm capable of doing that.. so why shouldn't I be able to get another written over say 60-90 days, right? Besides, most people take years to write their first book.

Anyway.. whatever.

I figured I'd share some of my progress here so you all can tell me if I should a) start over, b) try the other book instead, or c) keep this because it's awesome. Feel free to be mean and insulting.. I like it when people are honest.
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Chapter 2

Jenna walked quickly to the bathroom, dropped to her knees and vomited into the toilet.

As she re-entered the bedroom, Shane was zipping his pants and looked at her with little more than an empty stare.

"Did you just throw up?"
"Yes." Jenna replied as she began pulling the sheets off the bed.
"You want some help with that?" Shane asked sheepishly.
"No.. I think you've done enough already, thank you." she replied in a cold quiet voice.

He sat on the bare mattress and gripped the edge as he watched Jenna leave the room and return with a trash bag.

"I'm sorry." he said as she angrily stuffed the sheets into the bag. She paused for a moment and glared at him, tears starting their slow descent over her cheeks.

Shane rose from the bed and walked over to her, wrapping his arms around her as the bag fell to the floor. Jenna stiffened at his touch initially but then slowly relaxed in his arms as he stroked her blond curls. She leaned her forehead against his chest and let out a little sob.

"I'm so sorry, Jenna.." he whispered.

Jenna shoved him away indignantly, her stomach lurching again.

"How dare you touch me, you asshole." she hissed at him through clenched teeth. With that, she turned and walked out of the room, headed for the couch in the living room. She wanted nothing to do with the comfort of her own bed after what she'd just witnessed there.

"Are you leaving?" Shane asked as he followed her down the hall to the living room.
"No. I don't know.. why? Do you want me to?" she wasn't sure exactly what he meant by his question.
"No." he answered as Jenna sat down on the couch.

The room was spinning and she closed her eyes as she sank back into the brown suede cushions.

"I came home because I wasn't feeling well. I just need to lie down for a while."
"Oh." It obviously wasn't the response he was expecting.
"Shane, please, just go away.." Jenna said as she leaned over to lay down without opening her eyes. She curled up on her side as he walked back down the hall to the office. She tried to chase the images of Shane and the other woman going at it in her own bed but it was all she could see in her mind. She opened her eyes again, letting the tears fall freely as her mind filled with questions..

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Okay, let me know what you think.. and also, feel free to leave me ideas for another short story here.. a story idea, a prompt, even just an opening line. I love a challenge.

And now, I will go change a diaper full of butt soup..

6 comments:

Jess said...

Yummy, butt soup. I think the story sounds great how it is, however, I am not much of a writer! I do enjoy a good book though!

Lisa Brandos said...

I'm intrigued. I liked that I didn't know what it was about until the end of the exceprt. Maybe it should be the first chapter. Start it like that, then give the back story. Just a thought.

Amelia said...

hi there, I like Lisa Brandos idea...but I haven't read the first chapter. There's a lot of conflict going on within Jenna, she wants him, she wants him to go away, I could feel that pretty clearly. But truthfully, this isn't a story I'd really want to read any more of. I would like to hear more about a punk mommy raising 5 kids, issues negotiating family, spiritual, and social life. But maybe that's just me, and I just follow you on Twitter so I apologize if any of this seems unfounded. Maybe you've already written the book I've described. But I do want to encourage you! My sister joined a writing support group to help her work daily and she's found it helpful.

Captain Dumbass said...

I liked it, but have you not made progress because of the zoo or because your head just isn't in it right now? You can always shove the whole thing aside and start something new. Go back to it when it feels good again. That's cool that you can punch a story out in 30-60-90 days, but that doesn't mean you have to or even should. Take your time, gf. You know you got the skilz.

Julene said...

For what it's worth, I like Amelia's idea. There is a ring of truth that connects with a wider audience when a person fictionalizes what she lives everyday.

Petra a.k.a The Wise (*Young*) Mommy said...

I totally understand about wanting to give up. But we can't!!! So I will keep trudging through rejection e-mails while praying for a column of my own one day and you keep writing your novel, because it will happen for us!

 
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