Saturday, January 3, 2009

A tale of two kitties...

So, I cleaned up my basement.. It was *loads* of fun. Get it? Loads? Yeah.

I grabbed me some plastic bags and headed down to attack the mess left from the flooding and.. the CATS. I covered my hands and scooped all the.. *stuff* into garbage bags. Toys, puzzle pieces, game bits, papers, garbage, and.. doodoo. Ick.

Then? I filled my bucket, grabbed my mop, and started scrubbing away. It took me two afternoons, but I got it done (it's a good sized basement..). Then? I went out and bought me a new broom and mop head.. and bucket.

I have not yet gone *under the stairs*.. it's a two person job. And.. it will be done.

I'm so done with the raining ice bologna that is going on here in Iowa. Seriously. It's January! Gimme some snow already!! I need a reason to get a new snow shovel after I use my not-in-the-best-shape-anyway current one for shoveling more doodie from *under the stairs*. Though, it seems an ice pick might come in more handy.. for the ice.. not the doodie.

*Sigh*.. cats.

So when I was done cleaning the basement, I ice-skated my way across the driveway (only I had no ice skates and narrowly escaped landing on my ass..) to swap a few bags of trash and poo for some skate boards and other such things that roll so I could put them in the basement for the short people. Kieran got himself a scooter for Christmas, along with a pogo ball (why do they have handles now?? where's the fun in that?) and Baby Jo got herself a rad set of wheels too. We purchased some hula-hoops as well and it's all down there for some good ol' fashioned outdoor fun to be had indoors. Good times.

I'm sitting in the living room the other day, enjoying having the kids downstairs making noise instead of in the room with me, and Wizmo comes trotting over. He hops up on the chest next to my chair and then down to the floor behind me... and pees. On the floor. In the corner behind my chair. WHILE I'M SITTING IN IT. He has balls.. literally and figuratively (yeah, we need to fix that problem..).

The. cats. have. got. to. go.


Olivia has harassed Kelly to the point that my dear old kitty will no longer come up from the basement. She still pees in any laundry pile she finds, and has also occasionally beat up on Gizmo.. her own flesh and feline blood. She has also, once again, increased the feline population in our home. (Which is mostly our own fault.. I say mostly because she's not actually *allowed* outside.. she sneaks out.)


Gizmo still (apparently) has not gotten over the bad potty habits that his mother taught him. I'm not so sure what his future holds.. You see, aside from the random tinkles, he is a model citizen. He loves the kids, is a wonderful snuggler, and is so entertaining. We'd love to keep him.. I'd not love to keep cleaning up after him.


Kelly.. My poor sweet Kelly. I hope that once Livvy and her brood are out, she will quickly readjust to having the house to herself and embrace her right to free roam. She does enjoy having a feline companion.. another reason for Gizmo to stick around.. but that could always come later.


Bacon and Sausage.. rather than being fried up for breakfast.. will go along with their mother to the shelter, in hopes of finding a happy new home (unless of course we can find families to take them home..).

Anyhow.. sorry this post is so boring. I just have nothing better to talk about at the moment! My mind is kind of sludgy these days.. No worries, I'm sure I'll come up with something brilliant soon.. Something that doesn't involve excrement.

Anybody want a cat??


Irish Gumbo said...

A cat named Bacon? A cat named Sausage? Is this some sort of sick joke? Actually, it's rather funny. Although if my cat Bongo knew that, he/it would be tempted to eat the both of them. Bongo is a big fan of the meat, especially the bacon. Bongo loves himself some cured pork products, to the point where he will steal it right out of your hand WHILE YOU ARE EATING IT if you aren't careful.

Sorry about the sludginess, ny dear. I guess its that time in the winter cycle where we all feel a little beaten down by the weather and the cold. Ready for some warmth and some green, we are.

Good luck, and careful shoveling. I don't want to see a headline saying 'Iowa woman buired under mound of cat dung'. :)

The Mister said...

Hardly a daygoes by where I don't look at my troupe of feline miscreants and think, "piss me off one more time and you'll be pushin up tomatoes!"

Kat said...

I bet once you are down to 2 cats instead of elveventy billion they will start pottying in the right place. Oh and a rule of the thumb have at least one more litter box in the house than the number of cats you if you have 2 cats 3 litter boxes.

AravisGirl said...

My sister's cat is VERY LUCKY to be alive today, as she went into my mom's room one morning, hopped on her bed and deliberately peed where her foot was on her matlasse blanket. Technically, she's supposed to be an outside cat now, but E always finds ways around that fact.

Anyway, that's very gross. Very. Gross.

ChurchPunkMom said...

IG: hey.. they look like fuzzy sausages when they're born!
And as far as the sludginess.. I wish it were just the season.. that'd be easier to deal with. ;) I actually am usually at my best this time of year - but due to some unfortunate events last year.. I'm struggling. No worries.. my struggles generally lead to lots of good writing.. eventually. :)

Mister: I think my husband might tend to agree with you. ;) ..however, Bacon is working very hard to weasel his way into J's heart..

Kat: I hope so! and as far as litter boxes.. yeah, they're all over now. One on each level of the house, so we have a total of 4 right now, and 3 box-using cats. Another thing that has worked for Wizmo is to put a small box where ever it is he's *going*. Then he'll go in the litter box instead of the corner.

AG: ah, territory wars.. so fun! Yes, gross. The only time I had a cat pee on my bed, it was an accident. She was in very poor health and was incontinent.

Irish Gumbo said...

I understand, sorry about the incidents :(.

I get the struggles = good writing. I have a years' worth of journals documenting struggles, that I haven't even tapped yet. Lots of potential there.

I think of it as the 'blacksmith' principle of writing: getting caught between the hammer and the anvil hurts like hell, but can lead to beauty :)

Mama Dawg said...

I'd take 'em but I already have two of my own and a dog. Plus a squirrel. However, the fish died yesterday, never to be replaced.

Schmutzie said...

You are being featured on Intrepid Tuesday!

goodfather said...


goodfather said...

And.... wait for it.... TENTH!!!!

Yay!! I get something, right? :D

Congrats again on 100 posts. Seriously. I truly love your blog.

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