how to go through multiple rolls of paper towels in one afternoon and other ways of destroying the earth single handedly..

So yesterday while I was busy posting away all my mushy gushy feelings of adoration for the youngest of my offspring, my older children (more specifically, the ones with wieners) were occupying themselves in the kitchen with a train set and a bottle of maple syrup. Yes, maple syrup. A little reminder of why I should not be blogging at all? Perhaps.

When the cat's away.. the mice will play.

As I finished adding pictures and publishing my post, I realized that it was 2 something in the afternoon and my hair was still crispy from my post-shower mousse. Oops. I got up to go brush it out and noticed, as I peeked in the kitchen at my darling little dirt wearing dudes (seriously, if they were naked I probably wouldn't know.. I think they might be borrowing dirt from other yards.. there can't be that much in ours), some brown puddles had appeared on the floor and train tracks. Oh, crud.. Princess must have leaked something on the floor from her body... what could it be.. Then I smelled it. What the?... Yeah. Maple syrup. About half a bottle of it.

I'm so glad that I'm always so calm and collected.. cool as a cucumber. I never lose it with my kids.. Um. Yeah. I screamed at them and accused them of being the proud owners of malfunctioning gray matter. Then informed them that they were the lucky winners of a roll of paper towels and suggested that they get their butts in gear and put it to good use cleaning up their mess. Wow.. they are really impressive in their cleaning skills! Not.

I ended up helping.

The floor is still sticky.

And my hair is still crispy.

my crazy cupcake

My baby is both insanely adorable and.. well.. insane. She drives me crazy with her cuteness while also driving me crazy with her screaming-smacking-jumping-pinching-crying-clinging antics. One amazing little girl, if I do say so myself. And I do.

Her birthday is fast approaching and I'm not ready for it. No, I don't mean in the sense of party, cake, guests, candle, and gifts.. I mean, she's not old enough to turn one. I realize that I still have about 5 weeks.. But I think back to this time a year ago...

Big round belly full of baby.




I was busily setting up a spot for little baby in our room and purchasing yet another carseat to squeeze into our van. Having conversations with my Monkey about how he was sure it would be a baby girl and that he thought we should name her 'Cupcake' because it was a 'beautiful name'. Yes, it feels like that was a year ago.. it's amazing how time accelerates after the birth of a child. Passing so slowly as you await their arrival and then WHAM! all of a sudden, as soon as that cord is cut.. warp speed ahead! She's too little, too young, to be turning one.

She's the 'favorite' of many.. so sweet, spunky, smart, and silly.. sometimes she reminds me of myself a little.. the me that people don't really know. The part that takes work to get to, too vulnerable to be constantly exposed.

Her birth was so special for so many.. almost as much of an 'event' as her oldest brother's.. but so much more... perfect. His was in a cramped hospital room with more people than I wanted, some expressly uninvited - causing me to rethink my options in subsequent pregnancies. He was in a hurry.. unexpectedly rushed and a little unprepared (just as the circumstances of his conception), not quite ready when the moment came. It was still better than I imagined it would be, leaving me with no regrets. Hers, more carefully planned, my midwife honoring all of my few wishes.. In the privacy of my own bedroom, with only invited guests, she was born on my own bed, the very bed she was conceived on. Welcomed into the world by her family and some very honored teen age girls who still treasure the experience as they do her.




Through all the crap that we've been though this past year, she has been a constant source of joy. That little bright spot. We've enjoyed sharing her with other people in our lives. Enjoyed her laughter, her smiles, her giggles, hugs, and snuggles. Her obvious desire to bring smiles to our faces, her delight in making us laugh and just being a part of our household. Even Wizmo seems entranced with her, in spite of the torment she provides him with, always coming back for more pinches, smacks, and tail yanks.

I know that she will be an amazing girl, fun to be around and filling our house with laughter. Especially when she gets old enough to understand that trying to yank out mommy's nose screw is really not that funny!

Sweet little baby girl.. don't lose your spunk! Don't let the world beat you down and make you feel small. Don't let people kill your spirit. I wish I could build a protective shield around you so that no one could hurt you or damage you. Don't be afraid to fight back. I love you.




My name is Jo
and I like to dance,
My name is Jo
and I like to dance,
My name is Jo
and I like to dance....
Buuuuutttt....
I GOT NO PANTS!!
I GOT NO PANTS!!
I GOT NO PANTS, PANTS, PANTS, PANTS, PAANTS..

a night swim

There she was.. floating where the water met sky, staring up at the stars. She held as still as she could, listening to the water and feeling it lap around her body on her skin. It feels like home. She pulls her feet down under herself and ducks her head under the water, her arms stretching out in front of her as if reaching to push aside a curtain. She kicks her legs and dives down deeper, water rushing past her limbs as her feet flutter behind her. Then up again to the surface where she draws in another breath and water rolls off her head and down her neck.

She remembers wishing, as a child, that she were a mermaid. Wanting to live in the water, never having to leave. Never having to feel her ears flood or see her fingers and toes wrinkle. No longer having to come up for air. Weightless and graceful she glides through the lake, her limbs carrying her faster, the coolness washing away the stress of her day. Up her head pops for a quick breath and then down she goes again, drawing nearer to the shore. She begins to feel the plants growing up from the sandy bottom brush against her legs, like thousands of tiny gentle fingers tickling her. Like the touch of her children's hands. Her head rises once more out of the water and she spins around, stretching out on her back again. She gazes up to the full moon and thanks God for the water. Closing her eyes her arm extends above her head and scoops behind her, paddling her closer to land.. Home? This feels more like home to me..

Opening her eyes she stands in the water, close to the shore now, barely deep enough to swim. She pauses, sweeps her hands through the dark water, not wanting to leave. Then, slowly, she walks to the water's edge, enjoying the water swirling around her legs and body. She softly steps onto the sand and finds her towel in the dark, warm from the summer night. Wrapping it around her, she turns back once more and stares out at the still waters.. it's as if she was never there. Perfect.

Good night, my friend... Good night.