Embellished Truth and Polite Fiction

Hello.. I'm not here anymore.

2009-08-12T10:43:00.003-05:00

If you've come to my Blogger blog, I'd like to redirect you to my new WordPress blog. Now would be a good time to update your readers and blog rolls and such. Some of you newer readers will probably already be over at the new site, because you have my domain saved instead of my Blogger url. Good for you. For those of you old timer, loyal fans (*snicker*).. you'll need to update. I'm still working on getting everything set up over there.. so be patient with me.

Thank you!

Embellished Truth and Polite Fiction has moved!

The Lacey Blanket

2009-08-07T12:05:00.006-05:00

Darla leaned back against the wall as she sat on the dusty attic floor, wiping the perspiration from her forehead with the back of her hand. She held back tears as she gazed at the murky sunlight timidly spilling through the little round window and mingling with the dust and cobwebs. It must have been at least two decades since anyone had been in Grandma's attic. She wished she could have been up here under happier circumstances, that she could have sorted through these things with Grandma instead of doing it alone. She struggled against the sting of regret as it threatened to drag her down again.

Darla remembered playing in this attic as a child. She's spent many an hour digging in the large trunks and peeking in boxes, hunting for little treasures from her Grandmothers life. Mementos and heirlooms and trinkets filled the space waiting to delight and entertain her. The attic was messy and cluttered, as it always had been, and probably not the safest place for a child to play. But it became a second home to Darla. It was her hiding place, her refuge. As she'd grown her visits changed from treasure hunts, dress-up sessions, and tea parties to quiet time and contemplative moments spent scribbling in a notebook or drawing on a sketch pad.

Tears rolled down her cheeks and dripped from her chin to her chest as the memories washed over her, dissipating in the sweat that was once again accumulating on her skin. The weight of it all was matched only by the heat of the Wisconson summer, and Darla decided it was time to take a break. She pulled herself up off the floor and brushed the dust off her pants as she headed to the narrow staircase that lead down into the turn-of-the-century Midwest farm house.

Coming here from her California home was like a time warp, a real life twilight zone. The stark contrast between the hustle and bustle of her life in the Bay Area and this quiet piece of country in Excelsior still came as a shock to her. From the fast-paced, every man for himself attitude in California to the outskirts of town with little more to offer in amenities than the abundant hospitality and friendly smiles.

Finishing her descent from the second floor to the first now, Darla entered the large kitchen in the back of the house. She paused at the kitchen sink for a moment, gazing out the window at a garden now overgrown with weeds. As much as she loved it, Grandma just couldn't keep up with tending the little plot after she'd fallen ill in late June. Darla felt a twinge of guilt at not coming sooner, but she had been laid up herself because of morning sickness.

She let out a sigh as she poured a glass of lemonade and pondered the irony of it. Sickness. Sickness had kept them apart as one life began and another drew to an end. Her heart ached over the separation and the realization that this woman, who'd been such a precious part of her life, would never meet this unborn child. Exhaustion set in and Darla sipped her lemonade as she stepped out onto the shady wrap-around porch and seated herself in Grandma's swing.

A rapid fire flashing of memories raced through her mind. She could replay nearly her whole life in snapshots of her and her grandmother in that swing together. Right up to days before Grandma's passing when they had lounged there together on a breezy afternoon. Her grandmother snoozing peacefully in the swing under her favorite blanket. A pale blue blanket, edged in lace. A lacey blanket that still sat, folded neatly, at one end of the seat.

A light breeze struggled against the oppressive heat of the day and Darla layed down on the swing, resting her head on the blanket. She let the lingering scent of her grandmother's perfume comfort and lull her to sleep as the condensation rolled down the sides of her glass mimicking the tears on her cheeks.

My Darling Joella..

2009-08-06T09:22:00.007-05:00

Every day I look at you.. and I am amazed. I am amazed and frustrated, and envious and terrified. I fear my heart may burst with all of the emotions you evoke. Everything in your world is beautiful and funny and exciting. You run at life head on, with no fear, pushing your limits and eager for your next adventure or challenge. I hope and pray that no one ever scares you enough to shatter that courage. But if that does happen, I pray that you may find your voice and speak out against the wrongs done to you.. that you may pick yourself up, put yourself back together, and bravely move forward.
When you climb on furniture or run down the driveway to the street, I want to pull you back, to hold you tight, and protect you. I want to hold you back, to keep you to myself, just as you are. I might go so far as to point out that no one else is doing such things, and wonder what put the idea in your little head? But I know it doesn't matter to you. What those around you are doing is of little consequence, you truly march to your own beat. The world is your playground and everything in it is a new experience waiting to be devoured. And I smile knowing you have a mind of your own and you will go your own way, forge a new path. I admire your ingenuity and creativity.
Many parents have plans or hopes for their children, ideas about who they'd like them to be or how they'd like them to turn out. But I'm not out to mold you or shape you into who I want you to be. I want you to be you! And I delight in learning more about you each day. Your growing vocabulary and your new found ways of communicating surprise me everyday, and my heart aches as I watch you grow up right before my eyes. I can't wait to see the young woman you become! Watching you discover yourself and who you are is a privilege I wouldn't trade for anything in the world. I realize you won't always want me along for that ride, and that's okay. You are your own person, don't ever let anyone tell you differently. But please know that I will always be here to catch you when you fall and help you get back on your feet.
As you lavish your innocent love and affection on those close to you, I am in awe of how freely you dispense it. I yearn with every ounce of my being to protect you from ever having someone break your trust, betray you, or take advantage of your love.. perverting and twisting it and turning it to pain. But I know that I can't always be there to watch over you and I just hope that, over the years, you can trust me enough to be open and understand that I love you, no matter what. I will be here with an open heart, a welcoming shoulder, and a willing ear. If you ever need to fall apart, I promise to help put you back together.
Your laughter is like music. I step out on the porch in the morning, greeted by the sound of hundreds of birds chirping and chattering, and I can't help but think of you and your darling giggle. Like a lilting melody, sweet and precious. It warms my heart and makes me dizzy and euphoric, I can't help but stop and smile and laugh right along with you. The way you spin and dance and sing songs in your own tongue may not draw an audience but it is enough to make me wish I could dance and sing with you. But grown-ups have little knowledge or understanding of your world. To be so tiny again and free from the weight of adult responsibility upon you seems unfathomable at times. It is so beautiful to watch. The magic and mystery of childhood still fresh and new. You make me want to be a child again and I do my best not to intrude on your world, preserving it and protecting it from mine. Adulthood and maturity come soon enough and I want you to enjoy your carefree innocence for as long as you desire.
And then come the rare delicious moments when our worlds collide and mingle. Catching fireflies together as the sun sinks low in the sky, sitting in a tent in the backyard just because, tea parties and baby dolls and painting our nails on the back porch. They remind me that our bond is growing, they show me we are connected, and I will treasure those moments always.
Watching you play and interact with your siblings is breathtaking. The adoration and curiosity is palpable when you are with them. The way you watch them and communicate with them reminds me that this is the very definition of family. Our bonds are still new and seemingly unbreakable, I pray that they stay that way. This kind of love is what all families should be made of.
The more I get to know you, the more I adore and admire who you are. Your bold and courageous spirit astounds me and I love the way you delight in every new thing in your world! Ever eager to learn new things and explore new ideas, I thrill at the thought of knowing who you are when you are grown. It makes me want to be more like you.

Never Let Go - Part 8

2009-08-05T09:31:00.003-05:00

This time, packing and preparing for a move was much more peaceful. Sara didn't hear from Matt for the duration of that time.. She was a bit unnerved by it, to be honest. Part of her felt a little guilty for just dumping him the way she did and she had to fight the urge to call him up, apologize, and beg him to take her back.. But still, there was that underlying hesitation. She was also afraid. A shiver would run through her any time she imagined herself with him again. No. No more. The days leading up to her departure were tense and she was always looking over her shoulder, always expecting him to somehow sneak up on her.. not knowing what she would do if he did, not trusting herself.

Luckily, no one was ever there.

Sara's move went smoothly, perfectly really. She got settled into her apartment in Chicago quickly, and enjoyed her new job as an apprentice in a local theater. It was only about a month before she found an opportunity to audition for a big role and was accepted. Her heart soared as her dreams finally started to take flight. She missed the beautiful Elizabethan Theater in Ashland, but was thrilled to be on to bigger and brighter venues. She immersed herself in the escape of playing a part and becoming someone else. What a blissful break from her own life and her own troubles!

And then the phone calls started. Sara didn't know how Matt managed to find her number, but he did. He'd call at night and cry over the phone, begging for her to come back. Plead into the answering machine for her to let him come to Chicago. He'd remind her of how good things were before she left and longed to understand why she waited until things had improved to leave him. After a few weeks of that, she changed her number. But she felt awful. After all, he'd changed, right? Why didn't she give him another chance?

She began to feel as if she was the one who was screwed up, she was the one who was wrong. Apparently, she could only be happy if things were bad. Apparently, she just couldn't find it in her to love him unless he was being manipulative and abusive. What is wrong with me? she wondered.

She missed him. She missed him terribly. And she fought the urge to give in and fly back to Ashland.

A few more weeks went by without the phone calls and the ache finally began to subside. Sara was finally able to open her eyes and see just how much power Matt had over her. But still, she didn't hate him. She had little reason to at this point.. she'd managed to get out before things got worse. What might have happened had she stayed? What would the next offense be?

She reminded herself of this as she walked down this Chicago street to the theater on a brisk fall morning. Sure, she missed him. But the sadness of being homesick and wanting to be in his arms again paled in comparison to the relief she felt at being smart enough and brave enough to stand up and walk away.

Can we be honest for a minute here?

2009-08-04T08:40:00.000-05:00

This is not a happy post, by any means. And normally I would reserve such ramblings for my other blog.. but I just felt compelled to throw this out at the risk of vulnerability. So... yeah.

Sometimes, probably once a month, or maybe more like once a week.. well actually more like several times a day, I get overwhelmed.

The money, the kids, the marriage, the house, the thoughts, my brain.. I just want it to stop. I want it to STOP. Stopitstopitstopitstopitstopit.. What I wouldn't give to have a break, a day or two to not think about any of it, some time to just *breathe*. Relax and breathe, worry free.

And these are the moments when thoughts of suicide seep in. Like cold winter air leaking in under a doorway. You can stuff as many towels as you want against that little crack, but it still finds a way in. Yeah.. I said it. Suicide. But, I'm not that kind of girl. Suicide is selfish. And I care too much about my husband, my children, and my family and friends to do such a thing to them. No matter how many times that voice in my head ~~whispers~~ ~~screams~~ sneaks up on me, trying to convince me that I"m not good enough, that they'd all be better off without me, I won't believe it. Shut up. You're not real, and I'm not going to listen to you. And I fall apart a little more wishing I could make that part of me disappear, make it die. I want to die. But I'm not that kind of girl.

I want to make things right, I want to fix the broken things. But there's so many pieces scattered about that I don't know where to begin. I get overwhelmed. The more I look, the more I hunt for a solution, the more I pray and cry out to God, the more lost I feel. I grasp and cling to any shred of hope that comes along, but as soon as I do it dissolves in my hands, slipping through my fingers like water and tears. And I give up because it's too much. I want it to end. I can't do this anymore, you win. But I'm not that kind of girl.

I could spend my time wanting and wishing for better days, praying for things to change and throwing myself into any effort to work towards that goal. But for what? The more I push, the more I try, the farther and farther away that goal gets, the more it eludes me. And I'm tired. Further soon becomes forever and that distance quickly becomes more than a lifetime. A lifetime of frustration and missed moments and memories that should have been mine, that should have been happy. Is it worth it in the end? Is that what I want? No. I fight it. You can't take my happiness, dammit.. I will win. The fight is hard.. and I want to give up. But, I'm not that kind of girl.

I want joy in the simple things. Contentment in spite of the circumstances. We don't ask for much really.. Just time with the children to watch them grow, to teach them, to give them happy memories and positive examples. Not a childhood full of wishes. Wishes for parents who'd play more, who'd smile more, who weren't so crushed by the responsibility and obligation upon them that they're essentially unavailable. Parents who are shackled to mistakes they've made and can't find freedom from. And I fall apart a little more realizing I can't give my children these things and that voice is back, taunting me, You're no good, they'd be better off without you. But I won't listen. Go away. And as badly as I want to be free from all this, I'm not that kind of girl.

Life is out of control. It has been out of control for a long time, and I don't know how to fix it. The more we try to fix it, the more out of control it gets. And while some of the problems along the way were certainly due to our own irresponsibility, that amount pales in comparison to those that are just from 'bad luck'. I don't think that my life is horrible or miserable. It's not. Not at all. And compared to many, we are very rich.. we are privileged. But this isn't a game of comparison or who's better off than who.. It's simply a matter of feeling that my life is passing me by and so much of that feeling is born from something so much deeper than financial problems or having so many children to look after.. because it started so long ago. Can you hear me? Are you even listening? And I'm tired. I'm tired of being on the outside looking in. I'm tired of watching my life pass me by. I don't like sitting on the bank of the river, watching it flow past me.. I want to jump in and swim. I want to swim without feeling like I might drown. I don't like where I'm sitting, it hurts, and I don't want to do it anymore. But I'm not that kind of girl.

Why yes, I am depressed. Thanks for noticing.

Sometimes people seem to have it all together, but in reality they don't. So be careful little mouths, what you say. You don't know what is going on inside another person's mind, another person's heart. There may be a struggle going on so big and so deep that it is beyond your comprehension. And you may say something so small, but it might just be enough. I've had enough.. have you had enough yet? Some of us are very good at hiding our pain and keeping it secret. Why pollute other people's lives with unnecessary sorrow and heartache? It's bad enough we have to carry it, why should anyone else? I want to break free. But, I'm not that kind of girl.

Could I give it to God? Could I just let go and let Him carry my burdens? Yes, I can. Why do you think I'm still alive? How do you think I've made it this far? But it's hard. It's hard to trust Him when things don't ever seem to get better. Please, God. Don't give up on me. And some days? I just want to go outside and scream at the sky Where are You!? But I don't. Because this is life, and I'm living it. And I know where He is.. He's right here with me, carrying me when I'm too weak to stand.

I just wish I could stand on my own more often. I wish I didn't fall so much. Fall down. Fall apart. Fall into darkness.. You're so weak, you're no good. I want to silence the voices. You are so wrong, I won't listen. And I long for the light. But, I'm not that kind of girl. And thank God, for that.

BlogHer09 - saying goodbye.. and the loooong road home!

2009-07-31T18:40:00.000-05:00

Sunday morning was the recovery breakfast in the same suite as CheeseburgHer. It was sponsored by Starbucks, so we went. Cause I loves me some Starbucks. We met up with Neil and Twentyfour there again and giggled over coffee and pastries.

Off to the lobby to bid many friends good bye and snap a few pictures.. then off to Starbucks for more coffee. (What? we had to drive 8hrs home that day!)

Not that we're in love with Schmutzie and Palinode or anything..
but we're totally in love with them.

Karl and Twentyfour and Nanny Goats and LizRiz joined us for more coffee. We had a great time swapping stories of the weekend's frivolities but were soon interrupted by a lunch invitation from Schmutzie and Palinode. Sadly, Aman and I needed to get ready to head out of town, so we weren't able to join.

Seriously. How lucky are we to chat over coffee with these people?

We went back to Karl's room, where we'd stashed our stuff, and then hopped in the rental van to go drop off Karl's room key and make a last minute stop at Trader Joe's. Beer, snacks, hummus.. heaven.

This is the floor the put Karl and Neil on. (aka, the porn star floor)

Why yes! Heaven does come in a four pack! Just not in Iowa. Aman's favorite beer.

On our walk back to the van, we ran across some lovely Canadian ladies who wanted to take a picture with us! We were flattered. We dropped our bags right there on the sidewalk and hopped the fence with glee. She even let us lick her.

She totally wasn't grossed out and didn't think we were weird at all..

Or did she??

Off on the road we went, driving the incredibly exciting 5 hours back to Keokuk to collect our midgets, then back on the road around 8:30 for the 3 hour drive home.. It was a little scary, but we made it. By the end of the weekend, I was so socially overwhelmed and anxious that I'd worked up a nice little migraine and was utterly exhausted. Not to mention the average 4-5hrs of sleep we got each night. So, needless to say, Aman's cargosleepy kicked in during that last hour of the trip.. The same hour that my headache got bad enough that I could barely stand to keep my eyes open and I'd started shaking. It was FUN. Especially when we got home at midnight, had to change diapers, and put the kids to bed. Yippee!!

But it was worth it.

The End.

BlogHer09 - Wieners and boobs and burgers, oh my!

2009-07-30T14:08:00.000-05:00

Saturday morning we got up. We brushed our teeth with a Muskrat.

Good dental hygiene is important at such events!

We didn't have the snazzy free breakfast since we sold our tickets.. so we had to fend for ourselves. Dunkin Donuts it is!

The coffee was way hot.. the food was burnt.. AWESOME.

We made our way to the registration station so that Aman could transfer his Lobbycon ticket to my name. We went to the table outside the Chi-Bar, where Lobbycon was taking place, and they told us we needed to go to the main registration table upstairs. So we did. And they sent us back. It was rad.

So, he got his ticket transferred, kissed me goodbye, and trotted off into the Windy City while I got cozy with a leather love seat.

Lobbycon was awesome. Okay. Not really. I actually took the time to pull out my phone and send a message to Twitter stating that Lobbycon was so exciting I was having a really easy time staying awake and wasn't tempted at all to take a nap.

That's not the leather love seat.. that's me staring at the schedule. Which I did so awesomely that babyjidesign.com wanted to take my picture!

So after my snooze, I got up and wandered around, went pee (in the bathroom! sheesh..), rode up and down the escalators, texted Aman, stared at the schedule... It was all very exciting. Then I decided to to walk through the vendor's room or whatever they call the room with the big shiny things and people giving you free shit. I did my best to walk fast and not make eye-contact, only getting distracted by the laundry fairies at the ALL booth.. what? they had chocolate!

It was nearly lunch time by then, so I went up to wait for Aman in the lobby.

Everyone seemed to be busy with... stuff. So we went back to the hotel room for a bit and then wandered down to the Navy Pier for lunch.

We were tourists.. and stuff.

We have a place here in Des Moines where we like to get 'Chicago Dogs'. They are tasty. So we thought, why not get a real Chicago dog? Well, the Navy Pier probably wasn't the best place to get one.. being a big tourist attraction and all.. but we gave it a shot. And they weren't bad at all. I, of course, did not get a Chicago dog, I got a New York dog. But, whatever.

We did not get our hot dogs here.
I have my own Wiener Man, thankyouverymuch..
Lunch! They had curly fries. Yum.
Boobs and wieners. A match made in heaven.. or Chicago anyway.
and, yes, my boobs weren't the only nice thing to look at.

After lunch, we headed back to the hotel again and Aman showed me what he had been up to. Despite what BJHenry had told me, he was not out 'wife shopping' but rather 'shopping for his wife'. Not that it caused any confusion or anything.. *ahem*. My wonderful husband had spent his morning finding me a dress and shoes and tops and such.. just because. Well.. mostly because he couldn't find himself some shoes, but I suppose I'll forgive him. Leaving behind anything we didn't need, we headed back over to the Sheraton to see if we could fine our dear friend TwentyFourAtHeart who we'd been missing thus far and hoping to meet soon. No dice. Instead, we sat on a love seat in the rather crowded lobby and I tried to make myself disappear into my husband's chest. I was socially overwhelmed by this point and ready to go back to our room and crawl under the covers (or into the little fridge full of liquor.. but whatever.). But, Neil from Citizen of the Month would be having his session soon and Aman promised to help me sneak in.

I didn't have to sneak in. Along came Mary Anne, the Stiletto Mom and she let me borrow her badge so I could attend.. and as soon as she handed it to me? NakedJen stripped. It was awesome.. and akward. But that's okay.

I enjoyed Neil's session very much.. especially since I finally found TwentyFour there. I also had the pleasure of running into this nice fellow again and getting a picture together!

Have you met my new friend Karl? Because he is awesome!

Then it was time for the closing keynote.. We went back to the hotel to change for dinner and decided to just go back and chill in the lobby until it was time to head off to eat. This plan actually worked quite well. We even went to the cocktail party for a little bit.. but mostly to collect Neil for dinner.

Not that we ate Neil for dinner.. But rather he joined us, and TwentyFour, for dinner. Yeah.

Dinner Saturday was one of the best parts of our weekend. Despite the fact that we headed off in search of pizza and ended up with pasta, it was nice to get out with just these two good friends and not have the hustle and bustle of the crowds and shmoozing around us. It was so enjoyable, in fact, that we were quite late for BowlHer and decided to fore go it in favor of CheeseburgHer. Are you confused yet? Yeah. Well, we were just a little bummed that Aman and a few other of our tweeps didn't get to have PokeHer this year. For real.

And CheeseburgHer? Was like this..

Like... literally.

I did manage to meet Amy from TasteLikeCrazy before hand, another person we'd managed to miss most of the weekend, so that was awesome. But we stayed at the party just long enough to grab some wine and then made our way down and out to the patio along the river.

A very nice night to walk along the river.
Especially since I got to do so with TwentyFour.

We spent some more time in the Chi-Bar that night, since that's just what you do there apparently. Lots of laughs with awesome people and plenty of drinks to go around. Again, we headed back to our hotel around 2am.. without Mr. Muskrat..

TO BE CONTINUED...

BlogHer09 - a day late and a dollar short..

2009-07-29T11:11:00.000-05:00

Why, yes.. I did go to BlogHer09!

Aman and I bought our tickets to BlogHer09 in Chicago back in February. He had some extra work lined up between then and July that was supposed to be wrapped up and paid up before our departure, so we had no worries.

Not exactly how things unfolded...

Once we realized we would indeed not be getting any checks for the work he's done over the past several months before going (or at least not any checks that were good.. *ahem*), we went ahead and sold his ticket. Luckily, my friend Father Muskrat had recently decided to attend as well and was looking for a ticket to trade up from his Lobbycon pass... and was also looking for a room. We made arrangements with him and he joined our room and exchanged his Lobbycon pass for Aman's weekend pass.

We were scheduled to pick up a rental vehicle to drive the kids down to my parents' in Keokuk and then go along our way to Chicago, because.. you know, we don't have a car. Which we're quite accustomed to now, and don't really mind much at all. We knew that we didn't have the full amount in the bank for the car, but normally rental places don't charge you for it until you return the vehicle.. Not the case this time.

We were unable to secure a vehicle.. and thus, our plans began to unravel. As we grasped desperately at the string and tried to keep things from dissolving completely, we announced on Twitter that I was now selling my ticket.. and perhaps also the Lobbycon pass. We figured, since we could get a van on Friday we'd at least drive over for the parties and the second half of the conference. Better late than never, right?

I sold my ticket to Danielle, the creator of the Celebrity Baby Blog and, in the end, decided to keep my Lobbycon pass so that I could at least catch a little of the conference and take advantage of the vendor access. Not that I did. But whatever.

We picked up the van as early as we could on Friday morning, with the help of Mr. Kelly (thanks, Mr Kelly!), and were on our way to Keokuk. Surprisingly, our trip to Keokuk was uneventful.. aside from having to convince the boys to pee on the side of the road because, HELLO, we're driving in Iowa and there's not that many truck stops or gas stations to be found. There are, however, a LOT of cornfields.. and bean fields.. and gravel for little boys to pee in.

I'm totally going to have to get some Go-Girls when my daughters are out of diapers.

And no, I did not get a Go-Girl at BlogHer. Apparently, I'm just. not. that. cool.

We dumped our kids at my parents' house around lunchtime, snuck out the back door, and grabbed some McDonald's on our way out of town. We were on our way to Chicago! Woohoo!!

I totally made the comment as we crossed the river into Illinois that "At least we'll be driving in Illinois now.. so we'll have more to see than endless cornfields!"

Right.

"Oh, look hon... another cornfield." Only Illinois is much flatter, so you don't get to see all the cool farmhouses and barns like you do in Iowa. Bummer.

We stopped in La Salle, which is about halfway between Iowa City and Chicago (and the majority of you are now saying.. 'um... okay. so?') at the Flying J truck stop (and if you're not from the Midwest, you probably have no idea what that is..), where my Vibram 5 Finger shoes were a huge hit. I mean, lady in the bathroom who stopped her husband in the hall and pointed at me and also everyone else in the checkout line hit. I don't even know if they noticed my hair, they were busy looking at my shoes. Heh.

We finally approached Chicago around 7pm. From a distance, it looked a little like Des Moines.. only bigger, taller, and a lot grayer.

Seriously, from that distance, you can see the Des Moines skyline clearly.

We drove around for a while.. you know ~~because we got lost~~ just for fun. And after circling our hotel like 3 times, Aman called them (because I was too chicken. I made him drive in a strange place AND get directions over the phone.. am awesome.) to figure out how the heck we were supposed to get to their front door. And, when we got to the front door? We turned around and drove off to find a parking garage to stow our vehicle in so that we could pay $30/24hrs instead of $52/24hrs. Yeah.

We lugged our luggage (cause that's what you're supposed to do with it.. duh.) up to our hotel room, and I may have peed my pants a little when I looked out the window.

"Okay, we saw Chicago. We can go home now, right?"

Aman sat down and pulled out the laptop, hoping to get online and figure out the who, what, where, and when for the evening.. Only the promised 'free wi-fi' didn't actually exist. It was even more mythical than unicorns.. but not as mythical as The Bloggess.

I love hotel beds.. so squishy and comfy. Forget parties! Let's nap..

So, we decided to hoof it over to the Sheraton across the street and see who we could find and what we could find out.. We ended up having dinner with these fine folks.. and then some.

I stole this from BJ Henry, and yes, Undomestic Diva is groping herself. Brittany and I just turned away and let her have at it..
More less than mythical creatures (Avitable, Backpackingdad, and Redneckmommy).. I totally forgot to have Redneckmommy sign my boob, but she did agree to. I'm totally going to take her up on it next time. Oh, and that's not so much a 'Hey there's a cool chick over there.' point as it is a 'Hey there's another camera pointed at us.' point. So there.

After dinner was the MamaPopRocks! party and it was promised to be magical. It was totally magical. Almost as magical as Joset from Halushki recognizing me at the door and giving me the go ahead without checking her list.. but not as magical as my shoes breaking on the way back to the Sheraton.

First stop? The liquid courage table.

Hello, Templeton Rye guy! Will you be my new best friend??

The party was big, sparkly, loud, and full of people that were made of awesome. I met so many rad bloggers that I've gotten to know over the past year or so that I was quite overwhelmed by the end of the night! Aman and I were quite humbled and honored to have several people come up to US and be excited to meet us! Trust me the feeling was mutual. People like BusyDad, and Palinode, and Schmutzie, and MsBanshee, and Miss Grace, and Angry Julie, and Neil, and.. I could go on and on.

And there was silliness.

Yes, they are on the phone with each other. What? it was loud!
I got licked. AND she let me touch that piece of awesomeness on her back. YES.
I told you.. this table? The place to be.

Also? we were too excited to get our camera under control. Yeah. Parties are not so great for taking awesome pictures.We did manage to get a few decent shots though..

Massacred unicorn rump..
She was kind enough to kiss me before licking me.
The elusive Muskrat dancing with Miss Britt.. seriously, you'd think we'd have seen more of each other since we were rooming together!
Becky, Childsplayx2, and BJHenry.. I promise, this isn't how the rumors started..
Awesome people boogie down.

But, everyone knows, that when the party is 'over' it's really just beginning. Several of us went over to the Chi-Bar in the hotel and shmoozed and boozed some more. It was awesome to hang out with Angry Julie, Lex, EmmieJ, and BJ some more. Totally cool people!

Californians seem to think we're pretty cool.

We made our way back to our room around 2am and crawled into bed, making note of the fact that apparently Muskrats are nocturnal or something.. Thus ending the first day of BlogHer.

TO BE CONTINUED...

Wordless Wednesday

2009-07-22T12:19:00.001-05:00

Never Let Go - Part 7

2009-07-21T09:46:00.000-05:00

Sara felt herself growing more and more conflicted in her relationship with Matt. She really, genuinely enjoyed spending time with him, but there were those moments.. few and far between, but still there. Moments when he was harsh. Moments when he was controlling. Moments when he'd mock her. She could not ignore them.

The day before she was supposed to move in with Matt, Sara began unpacking. She locked the doors, having retrieved he key from him, and did not answer his calls until late in the afternoon. When she did finally talk to him, she knew she'd have to tell him she wasn't moving in with him.

"How is packing going? You done yet?" he asked.
"I'm actually unpacking, Matt. I'm not moving."
"What?? Why? I don't understand.."
"I can't do it. I'm just not ready." she answered.
"But we've been over this, Sara. It's better this way. It just makes more sense."
"I know, Matt. But I'm just not ready. I'm sorry."
"Don't worry about it. It's okay. I'll get over it."
"Really?"
"What do you mean, 'really?'.. do I have a choice?"
"Well.. no. I guess not."
"I'd rather have a relationship with you while you're still living there, than not have one at all. I love you Sara. I don't ever want to let go of you."
"Thank you for understanding, Matt. I love you too."

Sara felt light as a feather after the conversation. She felt almost silly for being so cautious and fearful. What was she afraid of? She laughed to herself as she put some more books back on her shelf and felt nothing but optimism about their future together.. It was almost enough for her to change her mind again. But she resisted. Something held her back.

It was back to happy times for Matt and Sara. Everything was peaceful between them and she felt confident that the 'incidents' were now behind them, chalking it up to working out the kinks between them as any couple might early in their relationship.

So why did she feel herself growing distant from him? Days and weeks went by and the longer he was nice to her, the more freedom he seemed to give her, the less interested in him she was. She began to wonder what in the world was wrong with her!

Finally, she couldn't stand the weirdness the whole relationship had taken on and decided it was time to break up and move on. Sara could honestly say that she no longer was in love with Matt. Sure, she was very fond of him and they were great friends now.. but she just wasn't in love with him. She invited him to take a walk in Lithia park on a brisk fall afternoon.

"Matt, I'd like to talk to you."
"Oh?" he forced a smile and let out a nervous chuckle, "This isn't the 'let's be friends' talk, is it?"
How did he know? Am I that obvious? Sara felt a surge of anxiety and was so happy to be in a public place.. that old fear started to seep back in.
"Matt, I just feel like we've grown apart.."
"I knew it." his eyes rolled back in his head and he threw his arms up in the air.
"I'm sorry. I like you. I really really do. And things have been really good for so long now.. I hate to do this. But I just don't have feelings for you like that any more and I don't want to waste your time or mine."
"I have never felt that any of our time together has been wasted." he said flatly.
"I didn't say that I felt I was wasting time with you.. " Sara sighed in frustration. The words just did not seem to be coming out right. "I'm sorry, Matt. But, I'm moving to Chicago in a week."
"What?? a week? What are you talking about?"
"I got a call about a job a little over a week ago and I've decided to take it. I've given it a lot of thought and it's a really good opportunity for me. I'm moving."
"Okay.. fine. But why can't we stay together? I'm sure we could make it work."
"No, Matt. I don't want to make it work."
"I'll move with you! Sara. You can't do this. You can't just let go. I told you I'd never let go of you." Matt's words were pleading, but his voice was urgent and firm as he grabbed her arm and held her tight. Sara was getting nervous and debated running from him.
"Matt. No. It's over. I don't want to do this anymore. I'm moving in a week, and you're not coming."
"You're going to regret that decision, Sara." Matt said coldly as he turned and walked away, sending a shiver down her spine.

My husband likes to try and embarrass me in front of famous people, but I don't care. EMERY!!!

2009-07-17T12:38:00.000-05:00

So Aman and I finally had ourselves another date.. It. was. AWESOME.

He informed me a few days ago that Emery would be in town on Thursday, July 16. So after I did a happy dance all over the house, I sat down and asked my totally kick ass friend Lisa if she'd mind chillin' with my chillun's while we attend the show.. Wonderful friend that she is, she agreed.

In preparation for said concert, of course, we needed to dye my hair.. the purple had nearly faded out. So we grabbed what was left in the red and pink bottles and slathered up mah head..

I was quite pleased with the results!

Anywho...
We decided that it would make much more sense for me to bus downtown rather than have Aman drive back in forth in the car we borrowed for the evening.. So I gussied up at home after scrubbing toilets all day and headed off after having a beer with Lisa (thanks for BYOB, babe!! I love friends who share!).

I rode the bus downtown and waited at Starbucks for my sexy husband. He picked me up a few minutes before doors were set to open and we stopped by the local Dahl's to grab some dinner and Red Bull before the show. Having done that, we headed over to the House Of Bricks in time to catch the last couple songs from Kiros' set. They were awesome enough for us to gladly buy a cd and t-shirt (for Aidan) and chat with the a couple of the guys for a bit while getting the cd signed. Stupidly? We did not get a pic with them. Bummer.

Next up was Secret and Whisper, a band we've listened to before and really enjoyed. They were awesome but the sound guy was not. Eek. (Hey, sound guy? You're supposed to be able to hear the vocals too.. not just blaring guitars! Ouch!) Still. Awesome enough for us to get a shirt, have it signed and take a pic with some very stinky band members (okay.. only one was really stinky.. and he made a big deal about it. but i had two older brothers and now have 3 boys.. I've smelled worse.).

Up next was Closure in Moscow.. We missed about half their set because we made a quick trip out to the car to put away some cd's and shirts. There were so many bands that each only played for about 20min. They sounded pretty cool though, from what we heard.

Then one of Aman's favorite bands was up, Maylene and the Sons of Disaster. The crowd finally woke up at that point (audience was kind of lame for the first few bands..), and finally managed to get rowdy and get into the show. It was awesome. Maylene did not disappoint and rocked hard. Again, I'm spoiled. T-shirt, signed, picture!

Aman told them to 'look mean'.

And then it was time for Emery. Aman is an awesome person to go to concerts with! He's big, he's tall, he can easily maneuver his way to the front of the crowd and all I have to do is hold on to him and follow close enough to not get separated. A very valuable date for someone my size.. I felt so small in that crowd! Of course, it didn't help that it was a predominantly male crowd so like 95% of the people there were at least 4 inches taller than me! We squeezed our way up to about 4-5' from the stage and he asked if I wanted to get closer.. I was afraid I might wet myself if I got any closer, so I declined. (And then a tall dude stood square in front of me.. awesome.)

Thank heavens, Emery had their own sound person. So their set sounded *much* better. They totally kicked ass, as I expected they would. Played a few old songs and a few new.. but were short on time thanks to a curfew in Des Moines that mandated they be finished by 9pm. (wah!!!) I already got an Emery shirt with their new cd, so I got pics with them instead.. all but the drummer. And it was just lovely getting cozy with a couple sweaty singers after Aman announced to them that I have a crush on both of them. He's cool like that.

After the show, we were happy to wait a few minutes to get all these lovely pictures with sweaty men and have some shirts signed.. then we walked a couple blocks back to the car. Aman pressed the remote button to unlock the doors and nothing happened. Apparently, he'd left the lights on and the battery died! AWESOME. He walked back up to the venue and asked around, quickly finding someone willing to give a jump. So we waited at the car for close to 10min and they never showed.. Bummer. We locked the doors and went back up the street together and quickly found another person who had jumper cables. SCORE. This person was kind enough to come back with us and give us a jump right away, so we managed to make it home safely. (Got jumped by Dan.. Thanks, Dan!)

Thank you to all the bands who came to the show in Des Moines, you all did fantastic! We enjoyed the concert and hope you all come again.

Photos and videos courtesy of Aman. Vehicle courtesy of Mr. Kelly. Babysitting brought to you by Lisa. Battery juice complements of Dan. Thank you!

Wordless Wednesday

2009-07-08T10:53:00.001-05:00

Never Let Go - Part 6

2009-07-06T14:16:00.000-05:00

In case you missed some and would like to catch up.. The rest of Never Let Go.

*************************************************************
Sara didn't hear from Matt for over a week after that day.

Part of her was relieved, but for some reason she felt the need to bring him back. She began to realize in that week just how much of her life she had let go of during the course of their relationship. She felt bad for ignoring her friends the way she had, but she didn't feel that she could call them now. What would she say? They would never understand.

So instead, she called Matt. And called him and called him. She even went to his apartment and knocked on his door, but there was no answer. Then he just showed up again. He showed up at her front door with flowers in his hands and a smile on his face.

“I'm so sorry.” he said to her, sweetly. “I was so wrong for the way I treated you. Please, let me make it up to you? I don't know what came over me. I promise it won't ever happen again..”

Sara melted at the sight of his smile again. It was as if that morning in the kitchen never happened. Sure, there was a small voice deep inside her screaming No! Please don't take him back! Don't trust him, don't do it! But it was surprisingly easy for her to quiet it with explanations of how it was her fault in the first place and if she'd just be nicer to him, she wouldn't have to worry.

She was in control of the situation.

Sara let Matt in the house and led the way to the kitchen where they put the flowers in water and then decided to pack a picnic to share in Lithia Park. It was a beautiful day, and there was no reason not to go out and enjoy it together.

Things went along very smoothly for quite some time after that, and Sara grew more and more confident in her decision to let Matt back into her life. She was especially grateful for him in light of the fact that it seemed all her friends had simply moved on and forgotten her. At times, she felt like he was all she had.

As the weeks turned into months, she grew more and more in love with him. The way he looked at her, the way he laughed with her.. they had so much fun together. It wasn't long before Sara accepted Matt's offer to move in with him. They were spending so much time together, they might as well save a little money on rent and live together, right? Sara started packing.

But the more she packed the more Matt told her she needed to leave behind. It soon became a battle over what Sara got to keep and what she had to leave behind. She felt that he was being unfair but understood that it was his apartment she was moving into. One evening, he came over to help her go through some of her things and pack but he ended up leaving in a huff as she pleaded with him to let her keep a few boxes of old letters that she'd kept from her childhood and teens. Letters from friends that she'd been pen-pals with for years. He said she was being silly and selfish and should just throw them out. She refused and he stormed off, slamming the door behind him.

That night, Sara went to bed feeling confused. She loved Matt so much. He was all she had now. But she was starting to rethink her decision to move in with him. The heaviness of the decision weighed on her as she thought of just letting go of so many of her things, so much of her life, so much of herself.. She wasn't so sure she was ready to do that. After all, he had hurt her before. Sure, it was in the past now, and things were better. But it did happen. She hadn't forgotten.

She wanted to back out. She wanted to stay where she was and not move. But Sara began to feel scared at the thought of changing her plans with Matt. She was afraid of offending him. She was afraid to go against his wishes. She was afraid of making him angry. This isn't right. I shouldn't be afraid. Why am I afraid? Nothing bad is going to happen.

She drifted off to sleep, convincing herself she was silly for being so scared. Of course Matt would understand that there were just some things that she didn't want to leave behind. Or perhaps she would see if someone would hold on to them for her for a while. Something would work out. Maybe he was right.. maybe she should just let go and move on. She was being rather silly and selfish. Things would work out fine.

Sara woke to the sound of a key dropping on her night stand. She opened her eyes but the room was still dark. A silhouette walked around her bed and she sat up quickly.

"Who's there?” she demanded.

"Ssshh..” an amused chuckle followed as her mattress shifted and she realized in her grogginess that someone was on her bed crawling over her.

"It's just me baby.. I couldn't let us go to bed angry, darling..” Matt whispered in the darkness as he pulled the covers off her and ran his hands over her body tugging at her pajamas.

"Matt, stop it.” she whispered back. “What are you doing here, how did you get in?”

"A key.” he breathed in her ear as he kissed her neck.

"Matt, please.. stop.”

"Sssshhh.. Let's not go to bed angry.” he said as he pushed her back down on the bed and lay on top of her.

"Matt.. you're hurting me.”

"Sara, don't be ridiculous. I would never hurt you.. I love you.”

Sara felt his weight pressing her into the mattress and she wished it would just open up and swallow her whole as she squeezed her eyes shut and tried to talk herself into being okay with what was happening to her..

Wordless Wednesday

2009-07-01T14:13:00.000-05:00

10 years ago today...

2009-06-26T14:45:00.000-05:00

I got hitched.

Wordless Wednesday

2009-06-24T09:19:00.001-05:00

Help Get a Good Girl out of a Bad Situation..

2009-06-22T19:13:00.000-05:00

I have recently become friends with a very sweet girl named Brittany. I have read Brittany's blog off and on over the past year after she left me a very nice comment on one of my other (anonymous) blogs.

Last month, Brittany shared her story at Violence Unsilenced.

There is a reason that VUS is the only 'button' I have in the side bar there (for now).. Most of my favorite blogs are all there in my blog roll, but if there is only ONE that you read out of all of them, VUS should be it. Go. Read. Support.. Please.

Now, Brittany is a lovely person. I have gotten to know her since her post there and from following her on Twitter. What it comes down to folks, is that she needs to move. She needs to relocate. Her current home situation is causing her all sorts of stress and anxiety that no person should have to live with.. it is toxic.

In an effort to help our dear friend, Aman and Cindy from Poobou have set up a donation account on PayPal that you may contribute to. There is also an email address attached for you to send her your encouragement and support.

I'm not one to solicit through my blog. And I don't see this as such. I only want you to help as you are able and as you feel led. But please, at least go and read her story and offer your support.

Thank you.

Friday Food!

2009-06-19T12:38:00.000-05:00

Wordless Wednesday

2009-06-17T08:41:00.001-05:00

Never Let Go - Part 5

2009-06-16T08:42:00.000-05:00

Sara woke feeling groggy and confused. Her head hurt and her body felt as if it was stuck in mud. Laying in bed for a few more minutes, she tried to recall the night before.

At first, she came up blank. Then, Oh yeah.. date with Matt. She slowly replayed the dinner, the after meal stroll, and coming home in her mind. But then things were very foggy, fear crept in and a shiver ran down her spine. I can't remember.

Sara sat up carefully, swinging her legs over the side of the bed in preparation for a trip to the bathroom. Her crotch hurt. Oh, no. No no no no no.. What did I DO? What happened? Come on brain.. think. THINK. She felt embarrassed, self-conscious, and ashamed. But she didn't know why. Oh, jeez.. what Matt must think of me... Matt. As she thought of him, a lump of anger rose within her. She couldn't think of why she might be angry with him, but it was there. She dismissed it as just being angry at herself for the whole embarrassing situation.

Sara stood and walked to the bathroom, she still felt slightly sluggish but she made it okay. She pulled on some sweats and ran a brush through her hair before gathering it into a pony tail, and then went downstairs. As she entered the hall to the kitchen, she could smell bacon and hear someone moving around in the kitchen. That's odd.. Ms. Worthington should be at work by now..

As she walked into the kitchen, she saw Matt standing at the stove scrambling eggs. He turned when he heard her come in and smiled at her.

"Hey, sleepy head. You sleep okay?" he greeted her. She felt indignant yet vulnerable in his presence and wondered both why and how he was in the house. Surely, he hadn't been there all night?

"I'm... okay. What.. How did you get in?" she answered.

"Your key." he replied with a smile as he held up her house key. Sara's cheeks felt hot and she grabbed at the key, but Matt snatched it up away from her with a playful look. "What's the matter with you?"

"I think you should go, Matt.. I'm not feeling well."

"No."

"What??"

"No." The playfulness quickly dissolved into anger. "I come over here to make you breakfast and you kick me out!? What the hell is wrong with you Sara?"

"I.. I just don't feel.." Sara stammered as he stood there scowling at her.

"I don't want to hear your stupid excuses. You have someone else coming over here, don't you!" he turned away from the stove, hot spatula still in hand.

"No.. no, I.."

"Shut up!" he shouted as he swung and struck her in the face with the spatula. She cried out as searing pain spread across her face and her cheek burned red. Sara cowered and slumped into a chair at the table, but Matt came after her and, dropping the spatula on the table, lifted her out of the chair and shook her. "I've been so good to you, and this is how you treat me!? First trying to wear that slutty dress last night on a date with me, and now kicking me out when all I did was try to make you breakfast??" he shook her one more time before dropping her onto the floor and turning to walk out. On his way, he knocked the pan of eggs off the stove on to the floor.

"Make your own damn breakfast, bitch." he spat as he walked out of the kitchen.

Sara drew her knees to her chest as she sat on the kitchen floor and let the tears come. She listened as Matt walked down the hall and out the front door, slamming it behind him.

Never Let Go - Part 4

2009-06-12T11:18:00.000-05:00

For those of you just joining us, or if you'd like to reread the first few instalments, go here. Sorry it's been a few weeks since the last segment, life ran away with my brain and things have been rather hectic. Thank you for ~~not abandoning me~~ understanding.
*****************************************************************

After a few weeks of going out with friends and attending various parties, Sara and Matt were about to have their first night out on their own. Sara was enjoying the pace of the relationship and Matt didn't seem to be in a rush either. Normally, she would have been on her own with a boyfriend at this point, but something about him made her somewhat hesitant. Still, they'd been thoroughly enjoying each other's company and even Sara's friends were quite taken with the charming young man.

But there were moments, when she would catch him staring at her with that mocking grin that she'd caught in the moonlight in Lithia Park, and it never failed to send a shiver down her spine.

Matt was picking her up at 7 and she was giving herself one last look in the mirror as she heard the knock on the door. She grabbed a sweater and headed for the door.

"Hey there." she said smiling, as she opened the door to greet him. He looked so handsome in his dark jeans, green t-shirt, and leather jacket, she couldn't help but feel a little self-conscious in his presence. He wrinkled his nose at her as he looked her up and down.

"I don't like that dress." His words stung, and Sara could tell by his tone that he expected her to change before they left. She felt indignant, hurt, confused, and a little angry. Her heart raced and a feeling of desperation set in as she wrestled with the choice of obliging him or ignoring him.

Feeling very small and a little helpless, Sara tried to form a response.

"Really? I.. uh.. I have another one that I was thinking about wearing.. I'll go put that on instead." as the words fell out of her mouth, she couldn't help but say in her head 'No! what are you doing??' It was as if this boy had some power over her, she wasn't so sure how she felt about that.

Sara looked in the mirror when she went into her room to change. He's right, really. It doesn't look good on me at all. Totally not my color. She took the dress off and picked up a slightly more modest blue one off her bed, where she'd tossed it when she passed it up for the clingier red one, and slipped it on. Much better, she thought. Definitely more 'me'.

Matt smiled at her as she walked back out to meet him. "Much better." he said approvingly. Somehow his words comforted her and she felt as if she'd won in some small way. His approving smile eased the sting of the initial insult.

The rest of the evening was lovely. A romantic dinner outside and a short stroll through the streets of downtown Ashland. Matt walked her to her door after their date and leaned against the wall as she slipped her key into the lock. She turned to say good night to him and he quickly pulled her to him and kissed her. Reaching his arm around her, he opened the door, pulled her into the house, and closed it behind him.

I don't recall inviting him in.. Sara thought to herself as she squirmed a little in his arms.

"What's wrong?" he asked with his teasing smile lighting up his face.

"Nothing.. I just.." she stammered as he held her tighter.

"Shhh.." he placed his finger over her lips. "We don't want to wake the old lady now, do we?"

"I feel funny.." Sara said, her head suddenly was spinning and her vision blurred. She felt as though she might pass out and leaned into Matt.

"I know, babe.. Just relax. Let's go sit on the couch for a bit. You probably just had too much wine." his voice was gentle and lilting.

"Can you help me upstairs? I think I should go to bed." she couldn't think straight and her bed sounded just about perfect at this point.

"Of course. Good idea." he answered with a grin as he helped her up the stairs.

Sara could barely put one foot in front of the other by the time they reached the top of the stairs. Matt carefully helped her into her bed and pulled off her shoes.

And that was the last thing she could remember..

Wordless Wednesday

2009-06-10T10:37:00.001-05:00

How I'm Surviving Being a Mom of 5 Without Murdering Someone

2009-06-09T10:02:00.000-05:00

Lots of sex.

What?

How do you think all these kids got here??

Yep, we're talking sex today, folks. I recently read an article that caught my eye in the SexIs online magazine produced by EdenFantasys regarding the much sought after 'female orgasm'.. more on that later (hopefully in a less run-on fashion)..

Seriously though, I find it sad that so many people don't make their sex lives as much of a priority once they become parents. Believe me when I say that I know how difficult it can be to make time/energy/effort to get each other in the mood, get yourself in the mood, and be capable of doing the deed.. but is it not worth it?

As they say, sex is like pizza.. even when it's bad, it's still good!

But there's more to sex than just good or bad, fun or chore, work or play.. it has benefits. As in, health benefits! Sex is good for you, both mentally and physically.

Here are some examples:

relieves stress. who doesn't need less stress?
boosts your immune system. even just once or twice a week can help your body produce more immunoglobulin A!
burns calories. I know I have extra calories to burn..
improves cardiovascular health. yep, all that huffin' and puffin' does a body good..
boosts self-esteem. who doesn't want to feel better about themselves?
improves intimacy. lets get that oxytocin flowing!
reduces pain. hooray for endorphins!
reduces prostate cancer risk. and cancer sucks.
strengthens pelvic floor muscles. better than kegels!
helps you sleep better. come on.. as parents, we all need better sleep, right?

Now, on occasion, I do hear women answer the question "Isn't it worth it?" with a "No." or "Not really, I'd rather just go to sleep."

It makes me wonder. Are they just not satisfied with their sex lives? If they're not, they should find a way to improve it. Because, sex is important! It's part of who we are.. it's how God made us.

Now, it's becoming more widely known that not all women are 'orgasmic'. Meaning, not all women have orgasms. When asked if they do, women give a variety of responses ranging from 'I can't.' or 'Hardly ever.' to 'I'm not sure.' and 'Yes, definitely!'.

I think it's wonderful that, despite the over abundant mingling of sex and culture, people are opening up more and realizing that a healthy sex life is indeed important. Even in more religious circles, I have noticed that women are more willing to open up to each other and discuss more intimate details to help better their lives in the bedroom. However, I have noticed that a lot of the discussion among women tends to be how to better please her man. And, while I am all for being all you can be in the bedroom, what about you, ladies?? Are you satisfied? Because that should be a priority too, just ask your man. I'm sure he'd agree.

There are a lot of things that are not covered in sex education these days. And while I don't think that everything needs to be covered when teaching our teens about sex, I do think that 1) they need more practical information than they are getting and 2) there needs to be resources for people who do want to find out more about the nuts and bolts of getting it on.

I personally have found the SexIs site interesting, informative, and even funny. Because when you really stop to think about it.. sex is very funny. Another good resource I have enjoyed is TheMarriageBed - for those who might still be feeling shy and would like a Christian perspective on sex and intimacy. So go, read, learn, and then get busy! It's good for you.

Wordless Wednesday

2009-06-03T10:59:00.000-05:00

New Kicks!

2009-06-02T11:58:00.000-05:00

Hey! It's my 200th post! To celebrate, I'm showing off my new Vibram 5 Finger shoes. I thought about just posting a picture of them.. like this..

But then I thought, 'Why not show them in action?' So, here is a quick video for you. Don't laugh.. too much. I'm wearing Aman's hat because 1) it's raining and 2) I'm having a bad hair day. Shut up.

There ya go. Feel free to make fun of me. I have flat wide feet. It is so hard to find shoes that fit without pinching somewhere and/or giving me blisters. I am so glad to have found these (thank you Jess!). I bought the gray pair at a store in West Des Moines and wore them out of the store to do our shopping. I'm looking forward to ordering a black pair of KSOs, but if any of you would like to send me some, I'd gladly post another video of me walking around in them just for you. Because I'm generous like that.

************************************************************
In other news, I have some awards to show off! Let's get started..

This first bit of awesomeness is from Lisa at Unfiltered Insanity. If you haven't read her blog yet, go check it out. Aman is in the process of designing it, it should be done soon.. I think.

Next up I have a fabulous award that I am most humbled and honored to receive from Kat at the 3 Bedroom Bungalow. Kat and I totally need to get togeter and knock back a few. We've had so much fun getting to know each other online and can't wait to meet in real life.

And last, but most certainly not least! Another from Lisa. She created this bad boy herself to celebrate the unveiling of her new blog design! Check her out, if you like her blog, I'm sure she wouldn't mind if you slapped this puppy up on your own page to link back to her.

I'm feeling stingy today.. after putting my mug on video for y'all. So I'm just gonna leave it at that. For you loyal readers of mine, feel free to grab an award for your own blog. I love you all, and you are what make this place worth while!

One last piece of business for the day: I have been contacted by Jump Start and asked to review their new online world and some of their software. I thought it sounded like a great idea since so many of you are parents as well and could benefit from this. With summer break upon us, who doesn't want some educational software to keep the kids busy, entertained, and learning? My midgets are certainly excited about checking it out. When I post the review, I will also have a giveaway for you all to enter, so stay tuned!

Peace.

Poetry Thursday

2009-05-28T10:40:00.000-05:00

Ladybugs

Ladybugs, ladybugs everywhere,
ladybugs landing in my hair.
Float and flutter
swirl and swish..
Don't land there!
Uh-oh,
squish.

Wordless Wednesday

2009-05-27T07:31:00.001-05:00

Random Tuesday Thoughts - catheters and boils and fevers, oh my!

2009-05-26T08:45:00.000-05:00

I like starting the week on a Tuesday. It gives me a chance to clear my mind right out of the gate. Thank you, Keely (go check her out, she's responsible for this nonsense).. but maybe it should be Random Monday Meanderings?? Hmm. Doesn't have the same ring though, does it..

Forgive me if I'm behind, I've hardly been online since Friday. What'd I miss?

So Friday night, all the kids were in bed, and Aman and I snuggled up on the couch to watch a movie. It was around 10 that Baby Jo woke up the first time. She was hot (no, not that kind of hot.. you pervs.), but I didn't think much of it since she was wearing a blanket sleeper and the house was fairly warm. I changed her pajamas and Aman rocked her back to sleep. She woke up again when he tried to put her down and she didn't seem to be cooling off at all. We gave her some Tylenol and rocked her to sleep again. This time she woke about an hour later, as our movie was ending. So I went upstairs and took her to bed with me. We barely got any sleep. Aside from the fact that it was like sleeping up against a space heater, she also did little more than roll back and forth, kick, and cry all night long. We got up the next morning and she was obviously rather ill. So I took her temperature and found it was 102.9 (which was actually 103.9 since it was taken under her arm). I gave her some more medicine and we called the doctor.

Aman was rather unhappy and informed me that he'd made plans with Lisa for just us girls to go out for lunch. Very sweet of him, but I wasn't about to leave my baby until I knew what was wrong. Instead, Lisa and I had a date at the local children's ER. Awesome.

Joella was fine. The doctor checked her over and couldn't find anything wrong with her, so they decided to rule out a urinary tract infection by getting a urine sample. With a catheter. How fun.

No urinary tract infection. (Unless they call me today and tell me otherwise.)

Since there was nothing more to be done.. I mooched a bit more off Lisa and had her drive me to Walgreens for ice pops and the gas station to get gas for the mower, joking that if Aman didn't get the lawn done this weekend, we'd surely have the county after us to do it. It was turning into a jungle.

We dropped off the goods, and headed out to lunch at Joe's Crab Shack.

We had a lovely time, lunch, shopping at Best Buy.. then it came time to head home. We were within a mile from Lisa's house and her car (which we knew was on it's last legs.. wheels?) started making a HORRIBLE noise.

Awesome.

Then? She got pulled over. Why? Her recently expired tags.

Awesome.

We waited patiently for the nice man in the blue uniform to give her a lovely ticket and then prayed that we could get the car the rest of the way home.. we may or may not have attempted a faith healing and an exorcism along the way.. I'm not sure. Just saying.

A distant rumble of thunder greeted us when we made it to her house, just barely, and I hopped on her computer to check out the bus schedule and find my ride home while she shared the good news with her husband.

I prepared to make my exit and jokingly said "Wonder if I'll get rained on.. knowing my luck, I bet I will."

I did.

I arrived home, a little soggy, and grabbed the mail on my way in. Jo was in pretty much the same condition I had left her in and I walked over to kiss my husband and handed him the cd and dvds I had purchased for him.. along with the letter from the county saying our yard needed a trim.

Awesome.

Sunday was much better.

Joella's fever was gone, and she was back to her usual trouble making self. I set up the water toys after Aman mowed one side of the lawn and kicked the kids outside to play while I cleaned up my ridiculously dirty house and did eleventybillion loads of laundry and dishes.. Only I didn't get the laundry done and only managed one load of dishes.

But the floors are clean(er).

Monday wasn't bad. The lawn was mowed, the house was clean(er), the baby was back to normal.. and the buses weren't running.. and we hadn't had a chance to go to the store yet.

We got everyone's socks and shoes on and walked up to the store to do the grocery shopping. We managed to beat the rain, which was nice, but Aman was supposed to be working on a project that needed to be done Monday night.. and he'd had little time to work on it all weekend. Nice.

But we got food.

Monday afternoon, I noticed my inner thigh was hurting. At first I though perhaps that I just had some chafing from walking to the store on a warm day in jeans.. but no. I checked it out and thought to myself What the hell is that?? Not so sure.. So I went to show Aman, who never argues about me pulling my pants down in front of him.. and we concluded that it might be a boil. One thing left to do! Look up pictures of skin boils on the internet.

Awesome.

It was a boil. I took care of it. It's pretty much gone now (I say that knowing full well that rather than thinking 'Oh dear, are you okay?' you're actually thinking 'Oh jeez.. why did you tell me that?? Ew!' you're welcome and thank you for your concern.).

What a perfect ending to an awesome three day weekend!

How was yours?

Never Let Go - Part 3

2009-05-22T09:43:00.000-05:00

I sat down to write this next part and got distracted by the news of my review by these Nice People (*snort*). So go read it when you're done here, and tell them what you think of it!

**************************************************************

To say that Sara was swept off her feet would be a bit of an understatement. Matt was not only handsome, he was chivalrous, charming, and very sweet. Sara all but forgot that she was out with her cast mates as she sat and talked with this intriguing stranger. He was a writer. Matt worked for a local magazine but also enjoyed writing poetry and prose and was even working on a play. How could that not get Sara's attention?

As the evening drew to a close, Matt offered to see Sara home. She informed him that she didn't live far from the theater and was renting a room in a little house up the street from Lithia Park. He proposed he walk with her and she gladly accepted.

It was right around midnight as the pair walked along the street toward the park, breathing in the warm summer breeze.

"Would you like to take a stroll through the park?" Matt asked as they neared its entrance. Could he be more romantic? she thought to herself.
"I'd love to," she replied softly.

They walked together along the garden paths in the moonlight. It was a clear night and the stars shone clearly despite the meager light pollution that the small town offered up to the night. The scent of flowers was heavy in the warm air and the sound of the creek gliding lazily over the rocks and sand rounded out the atmosphere perfectly.

Matt stopped in the gazebo and as Sara turned to see why he pulled her firmly into his arms. She was a bit taken aback at his abruptness and his firm grasp, but wasn't entirely opposed to his embrace.

"You are so beautiful." he breathed into her ear as his face came close to hers. He ran his fingers through her long brown hair and touched his cheek to hers as his fingertips slid down the nape of her neck. Sara felt breathless, speechless, and a little anxious all at once. She couldn't pinpoint where the twinge of fear was coming from exactly and decided to ignore it as Matt kissed her.

Again, she was startled by his forcefulness. He'd been so smooth and charming all evening, she'd imagined that he'd be a bit gentler with her. She pulled back a little, trying to catch her breath and he released her. He stood, staring at her in the moonlight, as a smile broke across his face. The shadows made it unclear, but Sara was pretty sure he had a very mocking grin on his face. He seemed pleased and rather amused with her response.

"I should really be getting home now.." she stammered. "Ms. Worthington doesn't like me coming in in the middle of the night, it wakes her sometimes.."

"Sure," he answered, offering her his elbow again. "Let's go then." His gentle manner had returned and Sara gladly took his arm as he led her out of the park and up the street to her house.

Wordless Wednesday

2009-05-20T07:27:00.001-05:00

Never Let Go - Part 2

2009-05-18T12:40:00.000-05:00

It was Much Ado About Nothing, the final play of that year's Shakespeare Festival, and tonight was sold out.

It was hot in the Elizabethan Stage, as always. But the wooden architecture and maze of rooms throughout lent itself so nicely to playing the part that it was, by far, Sara's favorite venue to perform in. And tonight felt as if it might be the culmination of her time with this theater group, as she dressed for her role of Hero.

Backstage was the usual bustle and chaos of the last 15 minutes before the show would open. The performers busy with dressing themselves, rehearsing lines, applying make-up, or tending to the divas of the theater. The air was heavy with body heat and the sound of lilting voices as everyone warmed up. Sara finished prepping herself and gave one last check in the mirror before heading up the narrow stair case and walking down the hallway to stage left to stand in wait of her cue.

The open air theater was packed in tight and a hush fell over the audience as the light came over the empty stage. Sara stood, poised and ready, as the butterflies filled her stomach and the near nausea set in with the rush of adrenaline that would overtake her right before any performance. Sara loved the sensation, tingles running down her spine and a lump rising in her throat. Sara breathed deep and let a broad smile spread across her face as the music began and they all danced across the stage in a lighthearted rendition of "Hey, Nonny Nonny".

Sigh no more, ladies, sigh nor more;
    Men were deceivers ever;
One foot in sea and one on shore,
    To one thing constant never;
        Then sigh not so,
        But let them go,
    And be you blithe and bonny;
Converting all your sounds of woe
    Into. Hey nonny, nonny.

Sing no more ditties, sing no mo,
    Or dumps so dull and heavy;
The fraud of men was ever so,
    Since summer first was leavy.
        Then sigh not so, 
        But let them go,
    And be you blithe and bonny,
Converting all your sounds of woe
    Into. Hey, nonny, nonny.

Sara performed her role perfectly and proudly walked out onto the stage with the rest of the ensemble for a final bow before heading back to her dressing room to change.

After the show, Tom and Lily informed her of the plans for the cast to gather at Standing Stone for an after show celebration. Sara agreed to meet them all there and gathered her things together.

As she exited the theater, she noticed a tall, handsome young man standing near the door with a bundle of roses in his hands. He spotted her and smiled as he headed her way.

"You were amazing tonight!" he exclaimed.
"Um.. thank you." Sara replied, wondering if she knew this fellow.
"I'm sorry.. how rude of me." he said, noticing her confusion at his abruptness. "I'm Matt. I'm a friend of Diane's and she's been talking about what a wonderful job you've done in the role of Hero here. I had to come see it for myself." he explained as he handed the roses to her. They were white, her favorite.
"Oh, I see! It's nice to meet you, Matt. My name is Sara.. though, I suppose you already knew that." she answered, blushing a little.

The boy was devilishly handsome and Sara was having a hard time not staring at his bright blue eyes as they looked at her through his shaggy brown hair. She felt breathless and a little intimidated in his presence and could not figure out why. It was uncomfortable and wonderful at the same time and Sara found herself stifling the desire to reach out and sweep the curled tendrils from his forehead so she could get a better look at his face.

"I was just on my way over to Standing Stone for a drink with my cast mates. Would.. would you like to join us?" she eagerly awaited his response.
"Yes! Yes, I would." he answered with a big smile, showing off his straight white teeth again. He turned and offered her his elbow, which she gladly took as they walked down the street toward the restaurant enjoying the warm summer night.

Prom-a-palooza! It's Dancy-Dance Time!

2009-05-15T11:59:00.000-05:00

NO, I did NOT forget that today was Bloggy Prom! And NO, I did NOT go running through my house hunting desperately for the Senior Ball pictures that I had intended to have scanned and ready to go by last night at the latest once I saw Pamela's tweet announcing that she had her prom post up..

Yes, I did go with Aman. Yes, we were high school sweet hearts. Yes, I really was that tiny and skinny. Yes, he really was a bean pole. Yes, our dance was only about 13 months before our wedding day. And, no, I did not have any trouble telling our prom and wedding pictures apart.. Duh. I didn't wear a veil to prom, I wore a tiara. And duh. I didn't wear blue in my wedding, I wore white.

Better late than never, right? Besides, I'm pretty sure we were late to our prom too.. so it's all good. (There's actually a pretty funny story about that.. I should have Aman put it on his blog..)

So, here they are. Enjoy.

The pre-game show...

I wasn't snobby. Just shy.

I'm pretty sure we only talk to like one of all those people now.. (Hi Evan!)

All together now... 'Awwwwe!'

And the formal shots.. Isn't he handsome?? Such a gentleman in his penguin suit! *Sigh..*

Trust me, we look way more elegant and sophisticated than we were/are. Still, we had a fun night.. at least, I did. And I wasn't boring enough for him to dump me afterward, so that's good. Heh.

Dumb Shwip..

2009-05-14T16:59:00.000-05:00

I had planned on posting the next part of my short story today, but it will have to wait. Parenting and... life have gotten in the way today. Whatever. It will be up tomorrow. I hope.

This afternoon the boys were playing and at one point Kieran says:

"Dumb... shwip." as he looks around and notices I'm listening. Yeah, I'm on to you buddy.. watch your mouth.

Aidan, on his way out of the kitchen with some crackers says, "Good thing you didn't say dumb shit!"

I laughed. I couldn't help it.

Dumb shwips.

Wordless Wednesday

2009-05-13T08:38:00.001-05:00

Random Tuesday Thoughts - God Needs Pants Too.

2009-05-12T12:37:00.000-05:00

I love home schooling.

No really, I do.

You see, I bitch and moan and complain about it A LOT when I'm disorganized. Because, you know, if I'm disorganized, then my kids are disorganized.. and if my kids are disorganized, then it just isn't going to happen.

Jo just stole the last bit of my burrito, squeezed the filling out onto her plate, and then gave it back. She's awesome.

I finally had time to get my organizer out and write out what needs to be done on what days for the summer.. things are now moving along smoothly once again with school. Not only do the kids see right there in front of me what is 'on the list' for today, but they also see it checked off when they are done - visible progress.

We like visible progress.

Like the progress we made on spring cleaning last weekend due to the fact that my parents were coming to visit. There's nothing like a visit from my mother to get my rear in gear! We de-crap-ified our dining room and kitchen which even included moving a few put-shits up to the attic. It's much nicer in here now.. even if there is a bit of an echo.. echo echo echo...

Where was I?

Oh, home schooling.

So yesterday, I had to make these folder things for the kids for their reading. Unfortunately, I suck at following directions. You see.. oh, nevermind. it's confusing. Let's just say that in the end they were supposed to have two sets of words on small pieces of paper - a group of /oo/ as in 'book' and a group of /oo/ as in 'spoon' words. Inside the folder, there was a slot for each group of words. But mom had them write the wrong words on the papers.. am awesome.

So I made the folders and then realized my mistake.. so what did I do? "Here guys.. just draw a picture on them or something.."

What the hell is this supposed to be shaped like?? The orange one.. in the middle there.. The things I find in my breakfast bowl...

So KJ starts drawing his usual stick figures and such. I start cleaning up reading stuff to make room for math books and glance at his drawing. It was.. interesting. He noticed me looking at what looked like an 'm' on the top of one leg and what looked like.. um.. a rocketship? on the top of the other.

He says to me "That's an 'm', and that's a 'puppet'." I laughed at him and said, "Okaaay... sure." and continue switching the books.

Then he says, "Actually, that's a butt, and that's a weiner." Only he's drawn pants around the figure now and is coloring them in. "That's why I drew pants on him." To which I reply, "Well, that's good. Even stick figures shouldn't go around with butts and weiners hanging out all willy nilly."

But that wasn't the end of it.. Oh no. There were more surprises in store for me. Here is the finished product:

Yep, God love KJ, and KJ loves God.. So much that KJ was kind enough to give God some pants.

In other news.. Last night I discovered that someone had posted the first part of my new short story, Never Let Go, on their news paper website blog thingie. Since I included Ashland, OR as a location in my story, it gained me some attention from Ashland Daily Tidings and they shared my story! I think that's awesome. But would love it if next time someone wants to share my work, they at least let me know they're doing so. Kthankx.

Part 2 of said story will likely be up tomorrow or Thursday.. Not sure. I'm working on that as well as my book, so it just depends on what I make more progress with. Patience people.

Really though, I just want to give you all more time to check out Part 1. So get on it.

My husband made me this for Mother's Day.

It was yummy.

Now go check out Keely, the fearless leader of the Random Tuesday Thoughts crew.

Peace out, homies!

Because you never know when you might need to be saved from killer crabs..

2009-05-11T00:05:00.000-05:00

As you know I started a contest to win something from Joe's Crab Shack, the awesome-est place to eat when you're in the mood to get crabs. You can see the original post here where I asked you to share about your favorite Joe story.

I know I was supposed to have this done like two days ago, but since ~~I'm pretty sure~~ everyone in my family ~~has the swine flu~~ has a cold, things have slowed to a crawl here once again.

Thank you all for your patience.

Here is the video announcing the winner of our latest Joe's Crab Shack give away!

My Embellished Truth and Polite Fiction - Joe's Crab Shack Give Away 2

Joe's Crab shack teamed up with Embellished Truth and Polite Fiction for a second give away. We have the ChurchPunk Family carving the winners name into Torrin's hair as Aman shaves his shag for a cooler look.

Check out Joe's Crab shack at a location near you http://JoesCrabShack.com

Also check out Family Force 5's new CD and Download "Dance or Die with a Vengence" coming out May 19th.

The winner receives a sweet Joe's Crab Shack t-shirt and $25 gift card as seen here:

Never Let Go - Part 1

2009-05-07T08:51:00.000-05:00

I enjoy a challenge now and then. So, this morning I was feeling a little stumped on what to blog about. What did I do? I went to my lovely followers on Twitter (all 540 of them) and asked them for an 'interesting topic or, better yet, a creative writing prompt'..

My good friend, Mary, from my local writing group gave me this gem:
"You find something other than lint in your pocket. It brings back memories.."

Now, let's get to work!
*******************************************************************

Sara pulled her jacket tighter as she walked down the front steps outside her apartment building. She was starting to doubt that she would ever get used to the cold here in Chicago as she pulled the zipper all the way up to her chin.

As she walked down the street, she lamented the fact that she had once again forgotten to slip on some gloves and she shoved her hands deep in her pockets. Only this time she found more than lint in the left one.

Hmm, what's this then? she thought. She hadn't worn these jeans since moving from Ashland, Oregon to Chicago last May. What could this be? she wondered as she wrapped her fingers around a crumpled piece of paper and pulled it out.

Sara assumed it was likely just an old receipt or shopping list.

But it wasn't.

She unfolded the small piece of notebook paper and immediately recognized Matt's slightly messy handwriting. Matt. He was practically the whole reason she'd left Ashland. Not that anyone knew that. They all assumed it was simply for pursuit of bigger roles in bigger theatres. But no, this move was even more of an escape than donning a costume and sauntering onto a stage.

God, I miss him.. Sara thought to herself as she gently smoothed the softened paper and walked street littered with red-gold and brown leaves. It wasn't much. Just a short note that he'd tucked in one of her books while visiting her one night, a short note with a poem.

My lovely Sara,
I'm so glad we got to spend this evening together. I won't ever forget it. I won't ever forget how you looked tonight, with your hair pulled up, and your silky blue dress that looked like it was made just for you.. Those soft tendrils of brown hair grazing your cheek, your neck.. I longed to be a lock of that hair, to rest against your smooth skin like that. It would be heaven to me. Thank you for going to dinner and dancing with me. I never imagined I would be so lucky as to have a girl like you in my life. But here you are. I will never let you go.

All my love,
Matt

the sun, moon, and stars
their beauty and wonder pale
when compared to yours

A chill went down her spine as she read his words. It felt like years had passed since that night. But in reality it had only been months. Still, the months had dragged on, full of confusion, joy, and pain. Sara was just so relieved to be far away from him now.

to be continued...

Random Tuesday Thoughts - Monkeys have nipples too.

2009-05-05T07:43:00.000-05:00

That's right my friends! ChurchPunkMom is having herself a little Random Tuesday fun this week!

I know you're excited.

But try not to wet yourself.
I really don't need any extra laundry.
I've totally forgotten what it's like to live in a house where laundry is 'caught up'. I mean, I know that no one ever really feels like they're 'caught up' on laundry.. but if I only had one or two loads of laundry waiting for me, I might just drop dead from shock. A household of seven generates about 2 loads of laundry a day (at least when small children are involved), just to give you an idea. Now, we do our best to be kind to mother earth and cut down on that work load a bit by re-wearing the not-so-dirty clothes.. but it still piles up pretty quick. And my bedroom is Laundry Central. I think there's carpet under the laundry.. but I don't know what color it is.

I'm looking forward to buying a box of crayons and knowing that none of them will be literally consumed, but rather consumed in the fashion that crayons are intended to be consumed. Life with short people is amazing.. and colorful.

Today is cinco de Mayo and I'm married to a Mexican, guess what I'm doing today! I wish we had some tequila.. A Mexican home without tequila is like an Irish home without whiskey.. we don't have any whiskey either. What is wrong with us!?!?!

Just so you all know.. that post from yesterday? The new Joe's Crab Shack giveaway (go enter!!).. the story was not written by me. I wish it was.. I mean, I thought it was a great story.. But it wasn't. It was my husband. I guess we all know who's really the creative genius around here now.. Secret's out. I may as well quit writing.. *sulk* Whatever. I shall go drown my sorrows in some garlicy butter sauce with some hot steamy crab meat.. mmmmm... crabs.

I'm now taking votes on what color to dye my hair next. Feel free to be funky, be creative, be crazy.. after all, I'm married to a man who actually went to work looking like this (I'm not planning to cut again though.. just dye.)..

I posted an excerpt of my current book in progress some time ago (in case you missed it, it is now also posted at The Open End).. Not many of you read it.. I cried a little. But thank you very much to those who did! And I think Captain Dumbass (who I rudely did not email afterwards.. I apologize) hit it on the head.. If I'm just not feeling it right now, I should put it aside and work on something else for a bit. I may just do that. I'm still feeling a bit stuck in the mud on that one and think I may gain some momentum if I work on my other one for a bit. Thank you, friend, for the clue-by-four. I must say though, I found it quite amusing that a couple (few?) people suggested I write a fictional story from my own life, or a fictional version of my life.. If I were to write a fictional version of my life, how would you know that that's what it was? I mean.. if it was fictional, wouldn't I change details so that you wouldn't recognize that it's about me? Wouldn't that be the point of making it fictional?? And how do you know that that story isn't just that? Or any other story you've read here? Hmmmm... You people.. You think you know me..

But I love you all. I do.

My kids are healthy right now. I'm going to enjoy it while it lasts.

Anyone want to babysit them for a few days while we go to Cornerstone in June?? We really really want to go and meet our fabulous friends the Daytons, but there are so many ridiculously awesome bands that we don't really want to bring the kids (I know.. we're so selfish). You may email your application to visit my wonderful adorable children starting... NOW. I won't even charge you room and board. I'm generous like that.

I got an award! I love awards. They are the awesomeness.. This award is particularly dear to my heart.. because it both lays eggs and eats brains! The Zombie Chicken Award!
I got this fabulous award from the loverly Pamela at The Dayton Time (you see why I'm inclined to go to great ~~concerts~~ lengths to meet her?) and here is what she said..

The blogger who receives this award believes in the Tao of the Zombie Chicken - excellence, grace and persistence in all situations, even in the midst of a zombie apocalypse. These amazing bloggers regularly produce content so remarkable that their readers would brave a raving pack of zombie chickens just to be able to read their inspiring words. As a recipient of this world-renowned award, you now have the task of passing it on to at least 5 other worthy bloggers. Do not risk the wrath of the zombie chickens by choosing unwisely or not choosing at all.

Wow! I'm not sure about all that.. but I like the sound of it. Thanks Pammy! *muah* And now, for 5 lucky bloggers who I will bestow this most valued prize to...

Lisa at Lisa Brandos at Home
Keely at The Un Mom
Aman at Only Aman
aaaaannndd... I'm too lazy to pick anymore.
so there... no wait. also, The Mister.

I really want a dog. I miss Molly terribly, and I want a dog. The upside? It's motivating me to get my house thoroughly cleaned up.. cause that's needed before a dog comes to live with us. And no, I will not be getting a labradoodle. What the hell is a labradoodle??

Oh, that's a Labradoodle.. hm.

Now, go visit Keely. She's like the Random HeadMaster and she deserves your respect. Go love on her and tell her I sent you. Cause I'm a teacher's pet like that.

I just told my 3yo, Eliana, to hug her brother less violently. For reals.

Joe Saved My Life From Killer Crabs

2009-05-04T18:20:00.000-05:00

So there we were, my hot hunk of a husband ~~Matt Damon~~ Aman and I, we were walking along a beach. It was glorious. We were perfectly content just enjoying the 2 of us and the sand and the water and the waves and the smell of the sea blowing into our faces and the fresh crystal clear water splashing onto our skin.

THEN! ALL AT ONCE! Aman grabs me by the arm and pulls me close and opens his mouth to say something. Instead of the usual sweet smile on his face (the one he has before he tells me that he loves me) I notice his eyes are glued to the road behind me and then I turn around and THERE THEY WERE!

Thousands of crabs on the road, coming towards us. They were all over and we were surrounded. We looked into each others eyes thinking this was the last we would ever see each other after the crabs attacked us... when out of the ocean came a man. I can't give all of the details as my eyes were closed with fright, but I can tell you he was a very attractive man with the sweetest voice... like honey on toast... well more like a sweet voice... anyway... he simply said "freeze" and all at once, as if he took a photo or freeze framed a video. Everything was still. Aman and I were left watching hoping the man did not kill us. He then blew a whistle and out of the water came a team of men and women who grabbed the crabs and placed them in their submarine/shipping bus. The man walked to us and said "my name is Joe. I come to save you from crabs and offer you a feast. Aman and I didn't want to argue with the powerful man... so we went with his crew of people served up the most delicious steamed crab, crab based appetizers, alcoholic beverages and other food.

As we dined and enjoyed the scenery, we noticed our children playing happily on the playground. All was right with the world once again.

He told us to share his awesome food with others by giving away a free gift card and a shirt to share his love for the crabs. How could we argue as we are but a simple people and he was something much more awesome.

So help him fight the war on crabs. We don't want them to take over the world.

IF YOU WANT SOME FREE CRABS FROM JOE'S CRAB SHACK, READ THIS:
The contest I am having is for a t-shirt and $25 gift card to Joe's Crab Shack. If your name is Kurt and you won this before, you cannot enter unless you get 10 new people to sign up. Feel free to tell us about your magical Joe's Crab Shack meal.

If you want to win you may do the following:

- Comment On this post and tell about either one of the 2 options
1. You favorite Joe's Crab Shack experience
2. Your most embellished crab attack story

- Tweet the following: "I Entered the Free Crabs Contest at http://myembellishedtruth.com #JoesCrabs - Click Here For Contest: http://bit.ly/zYznT"

Entries end at 11:59pm on Friday May 8th.

So get to commenting and tweeting.

Do it for me, do it for you.. do it for the children..
DON'T LET CRABS TAKE OVER THE WORLD!

I'm getting a HazMat suit.

2009-04-30T11:26:00.000-05:00

I have had the flu twice in my life that I can remember.

When I was about 10 years old, I had it. I remember it because of how miserable it was. I don't know if 1989 was a particularly bad flu season or not, but I had it that year. I remember lying in bed with my mother sitting with me. She was reading to me and I had to ask her to stop because listening to her was making my head hurt worse. There were lots of saltine crackers involved, as well as Ginger Ale, Thera-Flu, and chicken soup.. all of which were regurgitated.

I never thought that I would die though, so I guess it wasn't that bad, right?

I had it again last year. It sucked. Aman had it too, and that sucked. But we managed to not pass it to the kids, as far as I can remember.. so that's good.

How? Why?

We're smart.

The government isn't kidding when they talk about prevention methods such as 'wash your hands, cough into a tissue and then throw it away, avoid contact with other people, use bleach to clean household surfaces..'.

Anyway.. situations like this certainly make me thankful for things like home schooling and not having a vehicle. We're pretty much isolated as it is and the only opportunities we have for getting sick are through Aman or if we venture out of the house for church or errands.

I'm thinking that will be kept to a minimum if people in Des Moines start falling ill.

Seriously though, I think the government should just start passing out HazMat suits. Sick or not, wear the suit. It would certainly help to halt the spread of the disease right? I should work for the health department. I'm a friggin' genius.

Okay, probably not.

****************************************************
If you want to read some real writing instead of this dumb drivel, go check me out at The Open End, where the first chapter of my next book has been posted. I'd love to hear what you think!

Wordless Wednesday

2009-04-29T08:23:00.001-05:00

Favorite Music Friday

2009-04-24T08:00:00.000-05:00

Anberlin - Feel Good Drag

you know you want one...

We like to go outside.

2009-04-23T08:13:00.000-05:00

Last week, Aman stayed home on Tuesday because Aidan had to do testing with our home school teacher and we were doing paperwork for next school year. I will have three, yes three, kids doing school next year.. my baby boy is going to be in Kindergarten. Sigh. Not ready.

Anyway.

Since he was home, we took advantage of the lovely weather and the fact that we had a vehicle that day and drove over to Gray's Lake for a walk.

It had been raining the day before, but luckily the playground was nice and dry and the kids were able to play. The boys brought their scooters, Aman brought his skateboard, and I had the double ~~jogger~~ stroller for the girls. It was cool and breezy, but nice.

Torrin took no time at all to give up on the scooter (he just can't keep up with the big boys quite yet..) and Aman opted to toss his board in the stroller and walk with me too (once he realized that he couldn't watch my butt if he was ahead of me skating).

Naturally, I brought the camera along. So here's some pics..

Are you sure you're ready for this??
If the sun is out, Gray's Lake is crowded.
The boys were surprisingly brave and took off on their scooters way ahead of us. Like so far we sometimes couldn't see them.. Once we caught up to them, we made a game of it and had them start counting light posts and stopping every 5 or so.

Torrin was content walking with Aman and I while we snapped pictures.

Eliana wasn't sleeping.. she was grumpy for some reason. Maybe it was the sun in her eyes. Or maybe she just didn't want her picture taken.. Who knows. She has a bit of a Diva Complex.

Naturally, the highlight of the outing for the kids was playing on the playground.. The last time we were at that particular playground, I was pregnant with Joella. My parents had come up for a birthday picnic for Aidan. We need to get out more often.

We tried offering a couple of our kids to strangers.. you know, just to lighten the load a bit. But they all looked at us like we were smoking crack.

Yep, it was fun.

Until we decided to go home..

Funny thing was (well, not funny at the time.. is it ever?) that Aidan was the one to throw a fit.. go figure.

But it was late. So we ~~just locked him outside~~ forgave him.

The End.

Wordless Wednesday

2009-04-22T08:08:00.000-05:00

Hair - Part Deux

2009-04-21T16:13:00.000-05:00

I had a date with my hairdresser.

Aman and I decided my hair was getting boring. So a cut and some color was in order.

Some time ago, I bought a bottle of hot pink hair dye.. with the intent of bleaching some of my hair and dying it pink. I don't remember how long ago, I think about a year.. because I'm pretty sure it was after I dyed my hair black.

I don't have a clue what happened to that dye. Maybe we gave it away. I don't know. Whatever. We bought some new dye.

So we began with some research, picked a style that looked fun and headed upstairs to the ~~salon~~ bathroom to start snipping.

Aman produced an angled bob with a side part and ~~instructed me to~~ (despite all my arguing..) suggested I brush my bangs to the side.

(excuse my messy bathroom... it's the 'main' bathroom in our house - so 7 people share it..)

After the cut, it was time for some bleaching..

After the bleaching, it was time to add color..

And... the finished product!

We also added some color to the kids' hair.. but you'll have to wait for that. I haven't uploaded all their pics yet.

Because life gets overwhelming sometimes..

2009-04-17T10:10:00.000-05:00

Okay, friends.. I need your encouragement. I feel like my blog's been lacking a little lately - meaning mostly that it's veered off course from what I intended it to be.. about my writing.

I have started my next book. It's been over a month since I asked for your help and opinions on which story to write, and while I haven't worked as hard on it as I would like to have, progress has been made. I have written outlines for both stories and have the first 2 chapters or so of the winning option written (#2).

But I seem to be lacking motivation. (sick toddler, struggling with home school, too much time working out?)

And whenever I have a particularly difficult day (which happens often when you have 5 kids under 10 being cared for by two slightly mental parents..), I start feeling like I should give up. This little voice inside my head says 'What do you think you're doing? You don't have time for this.. get your head out of your ass and just focus on your family for now. You can't do it all.' But I can. I just need to manage my time better (don't we all??). No, I don't need to finish the whole book in 30 days, but I know that I'm capable of doing that.. so why shouldn't I be able to get another written over say 60-90 days, right? Besides, most people take years to write their first book.

Anyway.. whatever.

I figured I'd share some of my progress here so you all can tell me if I should a) start over, b) try the other book instead, or c) keep this because it's awesome. Feel free to be mean and insulting.. I like it when people are honest.
*********************************************************

Chapter 2

Jenna walked quickly to the bathroom, dropped to her knees and vomited into the toilet.

As she re-entered the bedroom, Shane was zipping his pants and looked at her with little more than an empty stare.

"Did you just throw up?"
"Yes." Jenna replied as she began pulling the sheets off the bed.
"You want some help with that?" Shane asked sheepishly.
"No.. I think you've done enough already, thank you." she replied in a cold quiet voice.

He sat on the bare mattress and gripped the edge as he watched Jenna leave the room and return with a trash bag.

"I'm sorry." he said as she angrily stuffed the sheets into the bag. She paused for a moment and glared at him, tears starting their slow descent over her cheeks.

Shane rose from the bed and walked over to her, wrapping his arms around her as the bag fell to the floor. Jenna stiffened at his touch initially but then slowly relaxed in his arms as he stroked her blond curls. She leaned her forehead against his chest and let out a little sob.

"I'm so sorry, Jenna.." he whispered.

Jenna shoved him away indignantly, her stomach lurching again.

"How dare you touch me, you asshole." she hissed at him through clenched teeth. With that, she turned and walked out of the room, headed for the couch in the living room. She wanted nothing to do with the comfort of her own bed after what she'd just witnessed there.

"Are you leaving?" Shane asked as he followed her down the hall to the living room.
"No. I don't know.. why? Do you want me to?" she wasn't sure exactly what he meant by his question.
"No." he answered as Jenna sat down on the couch.

The room was spinning and she closed her eyes as she sank back into the brown suede cushions.

"I came home because I wasn't feeling well. I just need to lie down for a while."
"Oh." It obviously wasn't the response he was expecting.
"Shane, please, just go away.." Jenna said as she leaned over to lay down without opening her eyes. She curled up on her side as he walked back down the hall to the office. She tried to chase the images of Shane and the other woman going at it in her own bed but it was all she could see in her mind. She opened her eyes again, letting the tears fall freely as her mind filled with questions..

********************************************************

Okay, let me know what you think.. and also, feel free to leave me ideas for another short story here.. a story idea, a prompt, even just an opening line. I love a challenge.

And now, I will go change a diaper full of butt soup..

Resurrecting Long Lost Boyfiends and Pukey Toddlers..

2009-04-16T12:59:00.000-05:00

I was going to write a big companion post to Only Aman's guest post on The Dayton Time.. but my baby was covered in vomit this morning.

So this here is going to kind of make up for my missing Random Tuesday Thoughts this week.. Yeah. Sorry about that.

I know how much you all look forward to hearing my brain muddle.. (come on, just lie and say you do.)

So anyway.. (just had to take a break to change a poopy diaper and refill a sippy with some diluted PowerAde that my dear friend Lisa was kind enough to pick up for us..) Sunday was Easter. We had our own 'resurrection' of sorts around these parts.

My old boyfriend is back.

It's been a long, long time since I've seen this handsome face that I fell in love with 11 years ago.. I love seeing his smile, seeing his face, seeing his expressions when he looks at me.. Oh, how I've missed this man.. He's not so sure how he feels about it.

To be honest, even Jo was a bit upset by it. She wouldn't let him touch her for 2 or 3 days, and still gives him the eye now and then (she gets that from me..). She's adjusted to it though, and all is getting back to normal in Daddy's Girl World. (It will be even better when she stops releasing the contents of her stomach onto the floor..)

Every time Aman comes home.. or even walks into the room.. I can't help but grin from ear to ear. I love his face.

(Jo just puked again.. yay.)

Anyway.. I need to go clean up some more vomit, change the toddler, do some laundry, and all sorts of other fun things.. So go check out Only Aman's post to get the scoop on The Beard and also The Uniform. If you like, I'll share more pics of the shearing on another day.

Oh, and go stop by Steenky Bee's place and offer your support in her attempt to land a blogging gig and then swing by Lisa's to enter her giveaway. I'll be busy cleaning up after my hurly-girl and ogling my gorgeous man..

Wordless Wednesday

2009-04-15T09:29:00.000-05:00

Operation: Hot Chick - Week 6

2009-04-13T08:53:00.000-05:00

Kung Fu Kick Boxing kicked my ass. Truly.

When I started doing the Bollywood Booty workout (shake, shake, shimmy), I started out doing the entire DVD every time.. and keeping up pretty well, I might add. Thankyouverymuch. (For those of you new to the 'workout DVD' world.. you generally get 3 workouts on any given DVD of increasing intensity, sometimes more if they're short - like '10 minute butt crunchers' or something like that..) So after a couple weeks of doing the Booty Shake once or twice a week (cause I'm awesome like that), I decided to give Kung Fu Kickboxing a go.. Wow.

I managed to get through the 'warm up', the first work out, and a cool down out before dropping dead on the living room floor. I'm glad I got that one.. it makes me work hard.

I also tried the Fat Burning Kickboxing for Dummies out last night. Also a very good workout, but I still managed to get through the whole DVD on the first try. Hopefully it will give me more of an edge on the Kung Fu Kickboxing.. yeah, doubt it.

So on Saturday we went out to run errands.. While we were at it, we stopped by Old Navy so I could get some pants. Now, before you start congratulating me, let me explain..

I got new pants because I'm too fat for the ones I have. Yes. I have gained enough weight since starting to try and lose weight/exercise that I had to go buy fat pants.

Okay, you can laugh now.

Done?

No??

I'll wait..

Anyway.. There are many contributing factors to my frustration and lack of success. First, Jo weaned about a month before I started this endeavor (that was part of why I was suddenly gaining weight to begin with). So after over 3 years straight of lactating, my body is.. adjusting. Lucky me. (Nursing fun fact: Did you know that lactating burns 500 calories a day?)

Second, this is just the way my body does things. I start exercising and watching what I eat. I gain weight. I'm never really very out of shape (I can't be.. I have 5 kids), so my body quickly gains muscle mass, but is not so good in the burning fat department. But it's not usually this bad. See above.

Third, I haven't been exercising enough. I've averaged about 2 times a week.. or less. Between the problems with the Wii, finding time, so on and so forth.. Yeah. But last week I managed to work out 4 out of 7 days (including the past 4 days in a row), so I'm improving.

I'd still rather not be buying fat pants right now.

*****************************************************************

Stats:
Starting Weight: 160lb
Current Weight: unknown
Weight Loss Goal: 30lb
(I have decided to stop weighing myself until my pants start getting looser instead of tighter. My scale and my butt are conspiring together against me.)

Miss me???

2009-04-11T10:13:00.001-05:00

Come see me over here.

My dear sister Pamela (not in the biological sense.. but I'll take what I can get since I'm the only girl in my family..) has squeezed out another little human.

So, if you want to hear me blather on about how wonderful she is, go check out her blog.

Bye.

Joe's Crab Shack Giveaway Part 2 - Pick a Winner!

2009-04-10T06:41:00.000-05:00

and now for the cleavage... i mean... and now i will give you my crabs... dang it, that sounded bad too.

AND NOW I WILL ANNOUNCE THE WINNER

^{(sounds a lot less ambiguous)}

The lovely winner of this Joe's Crab Shack prize will receive a $25 gift card and an awesome t-shit! We think it is an excellent time with family or for a date night or just a great time to show your love for crabs in public by yourself.

While you are there, check out their Crazy-Good Crab Dip or perhaps you might like to start your meal off with their Great Balls of Fire, we definitely enjoyed the Crab in a Bucket for 2 and our Pomegranate Pop Rocks Margarita. And, of course, wear your t-shirt!

So enough drooling, here is the winner, announced in video format (again, the audio.. camera's fault, not ours. and excuse my haggard appearance, my make-up people had the night off..):

MyEmbellishedTruth.com - Joe's Crab Shack give away winner!.

ChurchPunkMom from Embellished Truth and Polite Fiction announces the Joe's Crab Shack give away winner!

As usual. Watch the video - if you can't see it - well maybe you will find out if the person tells you in the comments.

I should be writing..

2009-04-09T10:07:00.000-05:00

.. but I'm here, entertaining you instead.

Kidding.

Kind of.

I mean, I know I'm not that entertaining, and this post will probably be pretty boring.. and, honestly, I should actually be doing something responsible right now instead of writing - like teaching my kids something, or cleaning my house, or exercising.. or something. Whatever. So how are you today? I'm doing okay. I just uploaded more pictures than you can stick a shake at. Now, I'm going to try to organize them into a post for you. You're welcome.

Last weekend, we went to my parents. As I mentioned on Tuesday, they both performed in their local theatre's production of My Fair Lady. They were fabulous, of course. My dad played the Zoltan guy and my mother was a cockney girl. They had a blast and I can't wait to see them in their next show.

It was a short visit, despite my parents living about 3 hours from us. We left on Saturday morning and came home Sunday morning so that we could be back in time for Aman's soccer game Sunday afternoon. The kids spent Saturday night hanging out at my parents' house with my somewhat distant cousin babysitting them.

Aman and I took the kids for a walk Saturday afternoon after lunch to help them burn off some energy (so they wouldn't drive Fallon totally crazy) and let my parents rest up a bit before the show.

(I just had to stop in the middle of typing up this post and go up two flights of stairs to plug in my laptop and finish.. my battery was dying.. and now I am. *huff, huff, pant, pant*)

It's been a while since our family has had a chance to get outside and enjoy the outdoors together.. We had a great time Saturday. See for yourself...

We somehow forgot to throw a stroller in the back of the van we rented (I know, right? we have a baby for crying out loud.. you'd think we have this down by now..), but it was all good. Jo was happy to walk the whole time. I was impressed. (And honestly, had we thought of bringing a stroller, we might have just decided against it.. because at this point in the game? it just feels like extra baggage that's not really necessary..)

Obviously, the girls had a great time running around together and walking down the street holding hands. Aman and I always get a giggle out of seeing how cute and girlie they are together. Even after 3 years of having a daughter, it still feels like uncharted territory for us after the previous 5 years with all boys.

The boys, however, did remember to bring along their scooters and helmets. They had a blast scooting all over my parents' neighborhood. They live right on the edge of the biggest park in Keokuk, the perfect place to live when you have grandchildren.. obviously. It's also a lot of fun at the end of April when they do the Civil War Reenactment in the park - oh yes, you will be bombarded with those pictures in a few weeks, make no mistake.

We went to one of the playgrounds in the park and played for a while with the kids.. it was quite windy, but the sun was shining. On the playground we took more video than pictures, I will save those for another post.

Eventually, we decided to head back to my parents' house to clean up and eat some pizza before the show. But not without snapping some shots near one of the awesome old brick buildings in the park. The kids love posing for pictures.. can you tell?

Of course, all that fun came to an abrupt end when my aunt hit Torrin with her vehicle as she pulled in the drive way.. It was a sad moment for all.

But he's made a full recovery.

I think.

Wordless Wednesday

2009-04-08T08:38:00.000-05:00

Random Tuesday Thoughts: Procrastination Station

2009-04-07T09:17:00.000-05:00

All week long, whenever funny little things happen, I think to myself "I should put that in my Random Tuesday post.." But you know what? Come Tuesday, I forget everything. Yeah.

So Aman shaved his head the other day. He likes to keep it shaved.. says something about it making him more aerodynamic.. I think he's just trying to hide the fact that he's going bald from me. I don't really know though, he hasn't let his hair get long enough for me to see.

When he was done, he put a longer attachment on the trimmer and, bringing it to his face, announced "Are you ready? Now is the moment you've been waiting for.."

I held my breath, watching as the buzzer neared the top of one of his sideburns.. and went right past it.

He shaved his eyebrows.

They're much less bushy.

We went to my parents over the weekend. They were in a play at their local theater - My Fair Lady. I'll blog more about that another day.. too many awesome pictures and videos for it to be in this post.

Notice I did not do my Operation: Hot Chick post yesterday? No? Good.

Really though, I still haven't lost weight. I'm obviously looking better and have burned some fat and gained some muscle.. but the scale is broken. It seems to be stuck. Whatever. I'll post that next week.

I've been getting a lot of headaches lately.. I'm starting to wonder if it's a tumor. But it's more likely just due to my lack of water and irregular caffeine consumtion.. and sleep deprivation.

You know those cats we had that were causing all the trouble? The ones that cleverly designed Mont Chat Merde? and were creating inbred kittens?? Yeah.. they're gone. We finally dropped them off at the ARL. Kelly is the queen kitty once again and is living it up.

I wanted to add some pictures to this post, but Eliana was bitching at me the whole time I was transferring them to the main computer. She really wanted to watch Noggin.. so I didn't bother uploading any pictures. Later.

I'm not a procrastinator... really.

Apparently I need to clean out our vents more often. Ellie was messing with the one at the bottom of the stairs yesterday and when I stopped her, I noticed some stuff in it. So I reached in and pulled some out.. and then some more.. and then some more.. I took a picture when I was done.. just for you. You're welcome. (I will add the picture in a bit.. must hi-jack the computer from the Noggin addict again..)

I'm not real sure why.. but Kieran always feels the need to sit around and blabber at me. Right now, I'm in Aman's Lair and KJ has followed me up here, using my cat as a guise for his blabbermania.. he's talking about anything and everything that he can think of - cats, the rental van we had, the weather today.. He should do his own Random Tuesday Thoughts post..

Since I haven't done Favorite Music Friday in a while (my blog says that 'favorite' should be spelled 'favourite'.. seems my own blog has gone all Canadian on me.), here's some Relient K for you. I couldn't post the official video because they have disabled embedding.. but whatever. This acoustic one is cool too.

Go check out my Joe's Crab Shack giveaway!
Then go visit Keely, The Un-Mom. She's awesome.

I blogged about date nite.. and I got crabs.

2009-04-05T10:30:00.000-05:00

And now, I shall share with you!!

Yep, it's another giveaway! So soon?? Oh yeah.. cause I'm generous like that.

You may remember that Aman and I had a date a couple weeks ago. Memorable because.. well, they're rare... but also because we had such an awesome time at Joe's Crab Shack!

Well, the hard work and many hours I spent slaving away on that post did not go unnoticed! That's right folks, I got crabs.. and now I'm giving them to you.

Joe and I are giving away to one lucky winner a $25 gift card and snazzy tie-dye Joe's Crab Shack T-shirt!

All I ask is that you leave a comment here telling me why you want Joe's crabs! If you want more than one entry, you can Tweet it (be sure to include #joescrabs in your tweet and link back here), you can Facebook it, you can blog it.. whatever! Just make sure you let me know so I can count it. I will leave this contest open until 11:59pm Thursday, April 9 and will announce the winner on Friday April 10.

Good luck with them crabs, folks!

EdenFantasys Giveaway Part 2 - Pick a Winner!

2009-04-02T23:18:00.000-05:00

Yep, it's time to select one lucky winner for the EdenFantasys Giveaway! I'm sure you all remember me posting last week about the lovely Enchanted Evening giveaway.. Well, the moment has arrived! I managed to snatch Aman's hat away just long enough to fill it with little blue tickets, upon which I'd written all the entries I've received for said giveaway. (I apologize for the audio.. I promise I will speak up next time..)I had my wonderful husband draw a ticket from the hat, let's see who the winner is...

MyEmbellishedTruth.com - EdenFantasys.com winner.

MyEmbellishedTruth.com writer - ChurchPunkMom has her husband pick a winner for her EdenFantasys.com giveaway.

Huzzah!

Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome! Awesome!

Okay.. so don't forget to come back Sunday when one lucky person will have the opportunity to get free crabs...

Kreativity is something I've never seemed to lack..

2009-04-02T15:26:00.000-05:00

I was going to post this in my random Tuesday post, but now I'm kinda glad I didn't.. cause I had a bit of a brain fart when it came to what to post today!

Sunday, my sister blogger Kat from the 3 Bedroom Bungalow across the Pond, bestowed upon me a totally swawesome award (that's like sweet and awesome all rolled into one). And she accused me of being kreative. Not sure I've ever been called that before.. but I'm guessing it was a compliment, so I'll go with it.

Here's the Rulez that go with this piece of bloggy bling (I hate rules.. don't you people know that?? what is it with people throwing rules at me all the time.. oy.)..

List 6 Things that Make me Happy and Tag 6 Unsuspecting ~~Victims~~ Bloggers to do the same.. here goes:

Writing (without it I'd be even crazier)
my husband
my kids (though, really.. it's a happy/miserable kind of thing if I'm being really honest.. I'm all about the honesty people.. keep it real.)
beer.. especially Guinness.
chocolate.. any really.
music (did you know I'm a musician too? music is like air to me.)

and (drum-roll please..) a few of my favorite friends..

my friend Lisa over at The Brandos Family. I actually know this nice lady.. and she makes me laugh. A lot.
FoN over at Kids and Daiquiris. Because she's awesome.
Keely, aka The Un-Mom. Because she's rad.. and geeky. And yeah, I'm into that sort of thing.
Kelly from PunkyBean - she makes me giggle. I like that.
Teri, my good friend handing out the Cold Lemonade.. because she really is creative!
and Pamela.. because she lets me come play at her place, The Dayton Time, and stink it up with my awesomeness. She's nice like that.

***************************************
And don't forget, today is your last chance to enter the EdenFantasys Giveaway! Winner will be announced tomorrow!

Wordless Wednesday

2009-04-01T10:22:00.000-05:00

Random Tuesday Thoughts: As much as I love Joe's, they're not the reason my daughter is named Jo.

2009-03-31T11:41:00.000-05:00

... seriously, it's not even spelled the same.

FedEx just dropped off a letter.. containing the details of my next job..

Agent Sylvia,

Thanks for the satisfactory job you did on the Ivan Stveklavastich assignment. We were unaware that a person's navel could be used in that fashion, nice work. We are requesting your services once more.

Please meet our representative at 3rd and Grand at approximately 1:23am on April 1. Be sure to wear something pink, bring a bag of marshmallows and have your machete at the ready.

Sincerely,
The Russian Government

P.S. If your husband wants to tag along again, please remind him to wear a hair net on his face. It's a good thing we found that stray whisker before someone else did.

I don't know what they have planned for me, but if I don't ~~show up for work~~ blog much in the coming weeks, please contact my husband. I hope this isn't another April Fool's joke, my pinkie finger still twitches everyday at noon for five and a half minutes from last year's.

Actually, it was just a gift card. From Joe's Crab Shack, for being an awesomefull customer and blogging about what a fantabulous restaurant they are. Keep your eye balls peeled and be watching for an upcoming giveaway from them! (I like my version better.. and don't lie, I know you did too.) Oh, and the gift card? It says: 'Crabs, the gift that keeps on giving.' Because Joe's is awesome.

Do you like my new layout? I think it's pretty rad. Look up in that corner over there.. no, the other one.. yeah, see that? I have navigation now! So you know.. I don't get lost and stuff. Oh, and for you too.. so you don't get lost. You're welcome. Click around, get to know the place, make yourself at home.. Here, have some coffee.

My daughter is clumsy. She's really freaking cute.. but dang, she is clumsy. She has a habit of somersaulting down the stairs. It's not pretty. She also trips on her own feet, bumps her head on doorknobs, and runs into my butt several times a day.. Of course, that last one isn't totally her fault.. I mean, my butt is pretty big these days.

I'm working on it.

Shut up.

Seriously. Quit laughing, it wasn't that funny.

I forgot that March had 31 days. Not only was I waiting for my archive to shrink back up when I stayed up past midnight last night.. but we woke up this morning thinking it was April Fool's Day. I had a great idea for a joke to add into my post today.. but then we realized it was only March 31st. I was sad. I may have even cried a little.

Last night, I got the camera out to show Aman (he'd prefer I refer to him as Aman instead of J, so as to reduce possible confusion) some awesome blackmail photos and we found that Aidan had made a 17min video of.. nothing. He likes to set up the camera in random places when he gets up in the morning (he's up before anyone else most days) and record himself playing.. it's... odd.

The other night, while we were working on my site layout, we also discovered that Aidan had added $1,150.37 worth of pirate crap to Aman's Scamazon.. I mean Amazon.. shoppping cart. Awesome. One of those moments we were glad he's not so good with the reading yet.

Aidan is awesome.

So Aman is my husband.. in case you all hadn't figured that out yet. Apparently, on Twitter, our PDA isn't enough to give it away. My relatively new friend Niel was a tad bit confused. Especially since Aman had apparently proposed that they be each other's wingmen at BlogHer and made no mention of a 'wife'. Heh. I let Niel know that he should watch out.. as Aman was more likely to encourage him to hit on me and then later actually hit him. He's a sneaky one, that man of mine.

A couple of weeks ago, we were at Target. I know, right? We shop too much. Anyway.. we were on our way out and walking past the make-up department. There was an end-cap display of some new schmancy mascara that was just clever enough to catch the attention of even my 7yo.. Guess which ones he couldn't resist touching..

Today, the wind is blowing like a $2 hooker. How's your weather?
Go check out Keely. She's rad.. and random. C-ya!

I'm gonna go watch my new MxPx DVD with my kids, who are almost all (except Torrin, who's waiting for his) wearing their new MxPx threads. Enjoy your day.. here's some real coffee.

Operation Hot Chick - Week 4

2009-03-30T08:47:00.000-05:00

Apparently, I'm one of those awesome people who gains weight when they exercise. Lucky me.

So last week, I worked out on Monday and Wednesday and then slacked off until Sunday. I may have snacked a tad more than usual and had a few insatiable chocolate cravings.. but on the whole, I think I did okay.

My scale begs to differ.

My scale is stupid.

I think I might throw it out the window.

Goals for this week:

less booze (what?? I don't drink that much! I just know it has a lot of calories..)
more exercise
less chocolate (wahh!!!)
no more snacking
more booty shaking

At least the exercise should be more exciting this week. My other DVDs are supposed to arrive by April 3, so just a few more days of all Bollywood Booty (which is really fun, but I like variety).

*sigh*

Not giving up. This is typical for me. I have hereditary crappy metabolism. But it will right itself soon.. and while it may look like I just gained weight this week, I actually gained and lost. So I'm taking heart that I'm already losing. Hooray.

************************************************************
Stats:
Starting Weight: 160lb
Current Weight: 162lb
Weight Loss Goal: 30lbj

Oh, and here's that 'before' picture for you.. I didn't feel like taking one that accentuates my 'trouble areas'.. so you can enjoy this pose with Ronald McFondle instead. You're welcome.

While you're here, and I have your attention, go check out the post right before (after.. whatever) and enter my first giveaway! Who knows, you might win that awesome package! Go!

An Enchanted Evening Giveaway from EdenFantasys!

2009-03-26T08:45:00.000-05:00

Yep, you read that correctly folks, I'm hosting my very first giveaway! I hope you're as excited as I am.. Let's get started!!

This giveaway is coming to you straight from none other than EdenFantasys.com! Now, if you don't know who EdenFantasys is (what? have you been living under a rock??), I'll tell you a little about them. EdenFantasys is one of the hottest adult toy sites around. But they are more than just that! Their site also contains lingerie, sex guides, adult gifts, tips, and many other products such as the sensual kit that I am highlighting and giving away today!

Perhaps you've noticed the PDA going on around here between my amazing husband and I. We've been making extra efforts in our relationship to not take each other for granted. We've been married nearly 10 years now and keeping the spark alive between us has always been important. How do we do this? Well, for one, we try to keep things ineresting in the bedroom. One of our favorite places to turn to for this is TheMarriageBed.com - this is a Christian site dedicated to sex. They have some fabulous information regarding sexuality and lots of articles to help you get over a variety of hang ups and inhibitions. They are also the suppliers of the Generous Husband and Generous Wife blog and emails - a daily message with tips on how to keep the fire going between you and your spouse.

J and I have never suffered from a boring sex life (I have 5 kids to prove it) and that's because we've made intimacy and romance a priority in our marriage. So.. with that, on to the giveaway!

The product I selected for my giveaway is the Enchanted Evening Sensual Lover's Kit by Lover's Choice. Sound fun? I thought so too.

Here's the description:

"Make it an unforgettable night" with the Enchanted Evening™ gift set, part of the "For Every Occasion™" collection from Lover’s Choice®. This lovely kit includes warming massage oil, chocolate body paint with a brush, champagne flutes, a dash of scented silk rose petals, and two tealights.

Set the mood by lighting the red tealights and watch the flickering flames dance across your bodies and the darkened room. Next, you can spread the sweetly scented rose petals all over the bed, floor, or your partner, allowing the silk material to lovingly caress their skin while the flower aroma fills the air. The beautiful dual champagne flutes are a great accompaniment to any intimate evening, though you will have to provide the beverages yourself.

When you’re ready to begin direct contact, the warming massage oil will calm the nerves and relax the muscles, allowing for a heightened sexual experience, while the chocolate body paint will make for some exciting play with licking, eating, and teasing all part of the agenda. An informational guide with romantic tips and ideas is also included.

Now, I don't know about you, but I thought this kit could find a very happy home in my house.. so if none of you want it, I'll be happy to keep it.

How do you win it? (you can't, it's mine) Simply post a comment here telling me one thing you do to help keep the romance alive between you and your partner! For extra chances to win, you can Twitter about this giveaway and you can also post about it on your own blog!

I will be announcing the winner next Friday after I have my handsome husband pick one out of his super sexy hat. So get to it! Give me your best romance building tips!

P.S. This one not enough for you?? My buddy Captain Dumbass over at Us and Them is also doing a giveaway! Go check it out!

Wordless Wednesday

2009-03-25T08:41:00.000-05:00

Make sure you check out Twenty Four At Heart today.. she called me a whore. (In the nicest way possible, of course.)

Random Tuesday Thoughts: Revenge of the Doritos

2009-03-24T08:42:00.000-05:00

Check out Keely. She's rad.

Pardon my dust. J and I have been working on giving my blog an awesome new look.. we're hoping to have it finished up in the next day or two, so if it seems like you see something different every time you visit, or if you see a random ninja or zombie wandering about.. don't worry, they're just the hired help.

"John is the best! Why is John the best? He does not care what people think about him. I mean who doesn't want to pick on him, or make fun of him. He is a pale white John of a John. Sometimes he tries to hide it with facades. One time I saw him in black and another time in pink. Both colors looked great on his pale outside, but I like it when he is nude. Yep, that pal John of mine. He has always been there. We read together, we talk together. Sometimes my dad would call me while he was hanging out with John. He is an all around great pal. He is there for me at all times, after I've had too much to drink, or when I feel sick, he always gives me somewhere to "let it all out" a place to get rid of all the bad stuff.
John that shitter of a friend." -J-

(I suppose I should clarify that 'J' does not stand for 'John'.)

I added a link to my Authonomy page over there ---->
Feel free to check it out. If you're a book lover, I urge you to join Authonomy! It's a great site with lots of talented writers showing off their work! Lots of free reading to be done, and many writers in search of a little feedback and support. Check it out!

Since I bought that booty shakin' workout DVD, I decided it would be best to wait until after the young impressionable ones had scooted off to bed before projecting it up on the wall.. after all, the lady also has a Kama Sutra workout video. No joke. Yesterday I had a case of the munchies and eventually found myself in the kitchen reaching for a bag of cheesey munchie goodness.. it's a mixture of Doritos, Cheetos, Sun Chips, and pretzels. SO healthy. I took the bag back to my chair with me (cause everyone knows it's more fun to eat right out of the bag..) thinking about how I really shouldn't be eating it and my time would be better spent working out.. even if working out just means walking up and down the three flights of stairs in my house.. before I even finished that thought, one of the cute little mini Dorito chips made it's way between my teeth and jabbed me in the gums. Serves me right, I guess.

The kids are watching Scooby Doo right now.. this episode had an alter ego of the Scoob and I just heard Velma come out and say ".. so don't worry! There's no Nasty Doo." Oh, trust me, honey... there's plenty of nasty doo in this house!

KJ just interrupted me to tell me one of his HILARIOUS knock-knock jokes:
KJ: Hey mom, knock-knock..
Me: Who's there..
KJ: Knock-knock..
Me: I said, who's there..
KJ: No, mom.. knock-knock..
Me: oh.. knock-knock who.. hurry up and finish the joke I'm trying to blog here.
KJ: knock-knock fall on the floor.

See? The kid's practically a comic genius. Not.

Yesterday I scared my husband. He came home and thought for sure that I must have murdered one of the kids or something.. I don't know what his problem was.. all I did was make dinner.
But see.. I made Mexican food.
It was basically chicken and rice, Mexican style, in the slow cooker. Anyway, it was so good I thought I'd share the recipe here with you.. cause it's easy.

You'll need:
1 package of chicken (we used thighs with the skin and bones.. I recommend skinning it)
1 jar of your favorite salsa
1/2-1C of water
white rice
pinto beans
medium size flour tortillas

Now, we have a large family so I made a lot. There was about 10 chicken thighs, a whole 16oz jar of salsa, 2 cups of rice, and 1lb of beans.

Get out your slow cooker or crock pot after lunch. Toss in the salsa, chicken, and a little water and stir it up. Turn on your cooker.
Follow the directions on the bag of pintos - I prefer the 'speed soak' method that involves rinsing, bringing to a boil, soaking for 1 hour, draining and rinsing, then simmering for about 2 hours.
Once your beans and chicken are cooked, turn on your oven to broil and scoop the chicken pieces out of the cooker onto a pan. Measure your rice into whatever you're cooking it in (we have a microwave rice cooker), and then scoop the liquid from the cooker out into the rice - double the liquid (so 1C rice and 2C liquid), unless you need more. We usually need more because that's just how our rice cooker is. Get the rice going and pop the chicken in the oven to broil for about 10min, or until it starts to get golden brown on the top. Warm up your tortillas on a plate in the microwave. Serve chicken, rice and beans with a salad and warm tortillas, enjoy!

Last night we spent half our dinner teaching the kids to use their tortillas as utensils after the boys had all made themselves burritos with half their dinner. Amateurs.

Anyway.. am I boring you yet?

Well, make sure you come back on Thursday.. I have a little surprise for you all in celebration of my new site design. It's going to be awesome. Be there.. er.. um.. here.

Yeah.

Operation Hot Chick - Week 3

2009-03-23T09:28:00.000-05:00

I'm a failure.

No really.

But I blame my Wii.

It's still broken.

Yeah, the Wii still doesn't work. I'm not real happy about that. I really liked the My Fitness Coach game. As a matter of fact, I didn't realize just how much I liked it until I started trying to find a replacement. I tried the Fitness Magazine build your own video thing.. but it just wasn't doing it for me. I need something that gets my heart rate going, and that one just made my muscles hurt, along with all the other videos on their site. After that, I figured I would have to cave and just get myself a workout DVD. I figured, 'Hey, we have an Amazon UnBox account set up.. and I have this wonderful $5 giftcard awarded to me from the fine people administering the ABNA contest.. I might as well put it to good use, right?' Right.

Sadly, Amazon UnBox (a program that sells digital copies for renting or purchasing and downloading) didn't quite have what I was looking for.. no matter. I found what I needed in their regular store. But I waited.. I figured, 'Hey, I can always get something at the store and then I don't have to wait for it to ship!'

Target has a LAME selection of workout DVDs. Just saying.

That's okay, I can still go back to Scamazon.. I mean Amazon.

I did manage to find this little gem though..

Ballywood Booty, here I come!

I figured, why not? It would give me something to do while my Kung Fu Kickboxing and Kickboxing for Dummies DVDs are shipping.. and it will be fun for J to watch me do! It's a win win really.

************************************************************

Stats
Starting Weight: 160lb
Current Weight: 161lb (I seriously considered lying about this.. what has become of me..)
Weight Loss Goal: 30lb

Life sometimes changes our plans.. and sometimes it's for the better...

2009-03-21T12:07:00.000-05:00

Last Saturday J and I planned a date night. Neither of us is quite sure when the last date night was.. just that it was so long ago that we both forgot when it was.

Though I suppose that's not really where the story begins...

I mentioned that we weren't able to celebrate St. Patrick's Day with my family, right?

My father's hometown in southeastern Iowa has many Irish people in it. His family took up residence there only a few generations ago. They came over from across the pond when the railroads were going up along the Mississippi. Yep, my gramps worked on the railroad.

Um.. where was I? Oh yeah. St. Patrick's Day.

There are several parties and events that take place on the weekend nearest St. Patrick's Day in and around my dad's hometown. Including a traditional corned beef and cabbage dinner with music from McNamara's Band (a Big Band that my grandfather helped start, he was one of the original members back in his baritone playing days.. or was it tuba? I can't remember now.. my dad sings with them now and a few of my cousins play..). This year there was also a performance at the Grand Theater with traditional Irish music (my dad sang at this too), bagpipes, and my dad's cousin's Irish dance class dancing.

Anyway...

We were all looking forward to going but, unfortunately, my dad came down with the Man Plague a couple days before. Seeing that my father really needed to be able to acquire adequate rest and we were not so interested in bringing home any illnesses involving regurgitation and defecation.. we decided to stay home. Everyone was sad, but we decided to make it an awesome weekend anyway - after all J had taken Friday off! So a date was planned for Saturday night. Our first in... a long time.

We discussed ideas of what we might like to do.. things like dinner, a movie, bowling, and what not.. Well, we planned on taking the kids bowling over the weekend already, so we decided to skip that. Dinner and a movie? Sure, why not. We planned to see Coraline in 3D at 4:30 and then have dinner afterward before picking up the kids.

We dropped the kids off... at 4:30. Oops. We talked about different movies we could see, but unfortunately finding movie showings during dinner hours is rather challenging - are the theaters and restaurants in league with each other on this? I smell conspiracy..

We decided to just head over to Joe's Crab Shack - our chosen fueling station - and have a long leisurely dinner. Can't remember the last time we did that! (geez, you'd think we have memory problems... ginko biloba, anyone?) After that? We figured we'd wander around the mall, maybe get something pierced or inked.. you know, whatev.

Dinner was fun. Well worth missing a movie for.

I got myself a pomegranate margarita with pop rocks. (actually, J ordered it.. he always picks me drink for me.)

J's drink was easier to pick.. we saw they had a margarita that was not only made with Patron, but also with Patron Citron (J's favorite.. in case you want to send us some..) AND it came with a free shaker! 'Hey, we need a new shaker!' Yeah.. ours broke.. don't ask.

'Hey, babe? What's that thing stuck on your head??'

I swear, he'd only stop staring at my boobs when I'd take the camera out. I think he likes me.

Now, we also have a strange habit.. nay, obsession.. with ~~making fools of ourselves~~ acting silly when we're out in public. We do weird things like stick straws on our teeth to make ourselves look like walruses, tell our wait staff that we have 5 rugrats and don't see the light of day very often, take pictures of each other through the evening and put them on Twitter... yeah, you get the idea.

Our waiter was nice enough to not laugh at us. And even allowed us to take his picture.. while he tied on our bibs. I totally did not tell him I would put his picture on the internet.. so if you see him.. um.. just tell him 'Hi'.

Doesn't J look happy? See.. I told you he totally has a crush on me.

Anyway, we ate a TON of food. Then we headed over to the mall to walk off our dinner and look for a piercing pagoda. Never found one. BUT we did find Glow Golf.

When we first started dating.. well, even before that actually.. we used to play a goofy old 1997 mini golf computer game. I'm not real sure who had more wins.. he'd probably tell you it was him, but I'm pretty sure it was probably me. Because I'm awesome. But I teased him relentlessly about the fact that I'd totally kick his ass on a real flesh and blood course.. (did you know mini-golf courses are made with flesh and blood? yeah.. think about that the next time you swing a club..) Which I did. Repeatedly. While we were dating.. and beyond.

Naturally, we couldn't pass up an opportunity to swing some putters at glowing balls. So we ~~stood by the trash can and chugged~~ finished sipping and savouring our Starbucks beverages (hey.. we tend to be tired.. dates generally require an extra dose of caffeine..) and ~~ran madly~~ sauntered casually over to the golf course for a round of put-put.

He totally cheated, by the way. I mean, I still won.. but he was keeping score. I'm actually not sure who's score he cheated on more though, mine or his.. He's such a gentleman.

(But I would have won even if he hadn't cheated.. I think.)

After our rousing round of mini-golf, it was starting to get late. We decided to swing by the Cheesecake Factory and pick up dessert on our way out (our dates don't 'end' when we pick up the kids..) and head back to our sitter's house to pick up the kids. Once slice of pistachio cheesecake and one slice of vanilla bean cheesecake in hand and we were on our way. But not without first TwiPic'ing the 'Ass stance' sign by the pond..

'Need help? Get ASS STANCE!'

And what date night would be complete without asking a random stranger to take a picture of us and ~~giggle at them~~ wait patiently while they try to figure out how your camera works?

It was an awesome night. Even if our Saturday evening wasn't spent celebrating St. Patrick's Day with my kinsmen or watching a 3D animated movie or paying someone to put more holes in my body.. it was well worth all the extra exercise I will have to do to work off the cheesecake and bragging rights on 'I'm still the better putter'.. and some real quality time with my wonderful spouse, remembering all the reasons we love to hang out together.

The End.

Operation World Domination

2009-03-20T12:49:00.000-05:00

I had planned on posting about our date night last weekend.. But by the time I got all the pictures and what not uploaded, my kids needed my attention more than my blog did. So here is a brief pictorial update from the ChurchPunkHouse instead...

In honor of J's beard turning 1 year old on Tuesday, one of his co-workers presented this picture (for those of you who've been with me a while, you may remember it from Dress Like J Day and my appreciation for senior humor) .

He still hasn't decided exactly what he's going to do now.. The last three days, however, nothing has changed. Same Uniform, same enormous mass of fuzz protruding from his face.. same plans for World Domination...

*Sigh.*

Aidan is thinking this World Domination thing may not be his cup of tea after all.. He's finding it a bit frustrating, to be honest.

This makes Jo giggle.. a lot. She thinks Aidan is a sissy and works very hard at achieving her father's dream. She wants to make J proud.. Such a Daddy's Girl.

World Domination... Exhausting work. Right Torrin?

Kieran is sure thinks he has it all figured out though. I'm not sure what he's got up his sleeve, but he gave me a shopping list the other day that I could barely read and mumbled something about fruit loops, bacon salt, and duct tape.. oh, and marshmallows.. lots and lots of marshmallows.. Hmmm...

As far as Eliana is concerned.. Well, we just try our best to keep her happy. Sometimes, I swear, that girl is just not right. She seems a bit.. off.

But don't worry too much about Aidan.. He still thinks his dad is "AWESOME!!"

And they kick you when you're down! Adding insult to injury, Amazon style..

2009-03-19T09:04:00.000-05:00

I was cruising the ABNA forums yesterday (many of us 'losers' are hanging around there in support of the quarter finalists, cause we're nice like that..) and I noticed a thread titled: Haha fooled you! - Didn't actually make the 2000 cut... So I opened it to discover that people had been receiving emails from Amazon/ABNA that were stating they'd received the other poorly written email announcing their excerpt had been reviewed but rejected and they'd be recieving their reviews by ACCIDENT. At first I thought, 'Oh, these poor people.. how aweful..' Then I thought, 'Hm.. I haven't checked my email all afternoon... ... ..oh, shit..' I quickly opened my email and found...

Megan,

We mistakenly sent you a message on Monday stating "Your Excerpt was reviewed by two Amazon Vine Reviewers, however, and their feedback will be made available to you via your CreateSpace ABNA Dashboard in the coming weeks."

We regret to inform you that based on reviews of your Pitch, you were not selected to move forward to the Second Round (Excerpt Review) of the contest. You will therefore not have reviews of your Excerpt posted in your CreateSpace ABNA Dashboard. We sincerely apologize for this notification error and regret any confusion it may have caused.

We hope you will accept a $5 electronic gift card which you can use for any Amazon purchase along with our apology. To use this gift card, place items you wish to purchase in your Amazon cart and begin checkout. Before you click "Place your order", enter your gift code (listed below) in the space provided and $5 will be credited towards your purchase.

Sincerely,
ABNA Admin Team

Now, I thought about just keeping this to myself. After all, it's a little humiliating after my post on Tuesday, to be honest.. But just by the sheer numbers alone of people who received this yesterday (like, we started another thread asking if anyone had not received both.. was there really a 'Top 2000'? or is this some cruel way of telling us they lost our reviews??).. I think Amazon should be the ones that are embarrassed.

And that's all I really have to say about that. Hmph.

*******************************************************************************
The Wii is apparently still broken. Boo.

Thanks to that nice little email up there, I now have to take another look at my pitch before I start sending off queries to agents. Poo.

But hey, I'm quickly climbing the ranks over at Authonomy.com, and that makes me feels real good.. Yup. I'm up to 914 out of nearly 3000 books. See? I am awesome.

My kids just noticed a moving truck across the street..
"Mom, there's a truck!.. a moving truck!"
"Yep, look at that."
"Someone's going to move!.... to America!"
Um.. yeah.

******************************************************************************
Oh, and this guy? He's awesome..

Shh... Don't tell him I put a picture of him in his secret lair on my blog..

Random Tuesday Thoughts: My Brain Hurts and I'm a Loser

2009-03-17T13:44:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was March 16. On February 9, when I flung my manuscript into the hands of Amazon and CreateSpace with wild abandon, I was informed that I would receive an email 'on or about' March 16 informing me of whether or not my book would advance to the quarter finals of the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award contest.

The contestants gathered, as they have for the past few months, on the Amazon discussion boards and counted down the hours and minutes until the moment when we might get word of our ~~doom~~ successes.

J and I checked on and off through the evening.. no word.

We put the kids to bed.. no word.

We watched Terminator 2.. no word.

We picked our noses and scratched our butts.. no word.

We tried to solve the mystery of The Strange Sound in the Floorboards.. no word.

J ran around the house in his wife beater with a wooden spoon to check for intruders.. no word.

Jo woke up and J rocked her back to sleep while we watched a few more episodes of How I Met Your Mother.. no word.

So the baby was back in bed.. and we were exhausted. We closed up the Amazon Unbox and got ready to turn the computer monitor off and figured 'what the hell.. may as well check one more time..' I had an email from Amazon! It was 'This weeks top 10... deals on HDTV!'

oh, and then there was this other one..

The Zombies awoke to find their formerly limber and agile bodies decaying.

Status of your Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award Entry

Megan,

Thank you for participating in the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award. We received thousands of submissions and were impressed with the incredible talent and creativity demonstrated by participating authors this year. We were therefore had to make some very difficult decisions. We regret to inform you that you have not been selected to move forward in the contest.

Your Excerpt was reviewed by two Amazon Vine Reviewers, however, and their feedback will be made available to you via your CreateSpace ABNA Dashboard in the coming weeks.  You will receive an e-mail from CreateSpace to let you know when these reviews are available.

Best of luck with your novel,
ABNA Admin Team

I cried.

No I didn't. The first time I read it, I actually didn't realize that I had made it through the first round. You see 'Your excerpt was reviewed by two Amazon Vine Reviewers, however, and their feedback will be made available blah blah blah why am I typing this you just read it..' means that I had made the first cut from the pitch review into the top 2000 out of possible 10000 entries. Yet, when my excerpt was reviewed, it did not make the cut from 2000 to the 500 quarter finalists. Boo.

They found that despite their deathly state, the zombies could move.

S'all good though. This means I have a good pitch, which is very encouraging because it was the first pitch I'd ever written and only spent 2 hours on it.. only.

Anyway.

Today is Saint Patrick's Day. I'm wearing green. We had green toast for breakfast and green peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for lunch.. I will soon begin the preparation of some tastylicious corned beef and cabbage for dinner. YUM. I'm looking forward to it.

There was only one thing that kept over-powering their wills to lead normal and sometimes better lives; flesh!

We had a crazy busy weekend. I went to hang out with my friend Lisa last Thursday and giggle over wine glasses.. then she and her hubby came over to our place on Friday night to.. well, pretty much do the same only with different alcoholic beverages. Saturday we had a date night during which we wore bibs, whacked glowing balls, consumed beverages involving pop rocks, and checked out the ass stance.. more on that later. Sunday involved a trip to the old sanctuary (haven't been to church in weeks!) and then pizza and bowling with family and friends. Was all AWESOME.

So today I has been busy. Busy researching agents to query and taking down notes on what I need to do to spruce up my excerpt. I have also joined Authonomy.com and put my first 5 chapters up there. Feel free to check it out and tell me it sucks (just be aware that my posse might hunt you down if you ain't respectful).

Joan was among the living, but now she is simply rotting flesh craving the flesh of the living, only creating a paradox that will destroy the living.

Kieran decided to give himself a hair cut last week.. I believe it was on Thursday. He was tired of us saying we would give him a hair cut, calling him shaggy and what not.. so he took matters into his own hands. He, joined by his 5yo brother Torrin, went upstairs and pulled out the hair cutting scissors and went to work. Torrin was kind enough to 'tell him where to cut' as he got all snip happy with his head. The end result could have been a lot worse.. I suppose..

Don't worry... I did touch it up before soccer Wednesday night.. oh, hey.. I guess it was Wednesday not Thursday. My bad.

Torrin wants me to buy him a new Thomas and Deisel DVD.. He says: "Maybe it costs a hudred bucks.. but I don't think so. Maybe it just costs a little bucks."

I guess I should go like.. exercise or something..

Operation Hot Chick - Week 2

2009-03-16T14:50:00.000-05:00

The past week has been... interesting.

As you may recall (or not), last week I committed to working out with My Fitness Coach on Wii 6 times a week. My workouts on Sunday and Monday were decent.. and then on Tuesday, my Wii promptly decided to cease functioning.

Awesome.

So between my toddler force-feeding me fruit snacks and Cheeze-Its, pulling every bribe I could to get the kids to go to bed at night so I could work out, and then my wonderful offspring breaking the dang Wii.. I was starting to feel as if my kids were somehow conspiring against me to keep me chubby. Even in spite of the fact that Aidan is always asking me "When will you get back to like you used to be, when you were skinny?" He's such a flatterer, that one. And a real motivator to boot. I'm so lucky.

Well, my darling husband was kind enough to remind me that I can build my own workout video on FitnessMagazine.com (he works for Meredith, the company that publishes that and many other popular magazines). Brilliant! Then I can use our handy dandy projector and do the video just as I would my Wii game.

Wednesday I made my video. I haven't done the work out yet though.. actually I haven't even watched the whole thing, to tell the truth! I know. Shame on me.

Still, I've been more careful about what goes into my mouth over the past week, and have behaved myself pretty well... most of the time..

********************************************

Stats:
Starting weight: 160lb
Current weight: 157lb
Weight loss goal: 30lb

Never fear, friends.. that same wonderful husband has purchased a Wii cleaning disc and has repaired our game console. We are back in business (dang it!). Now, all I have to do is get my game back from the friend I loaned it to.. In the meantime, I shall do some Wii Fit instead. Wish me luck..

Wordless Wednesday

2009-03-11T08:59:00.000-05:00

Random Tuesday Thoughts: I am a Russian Spy Named Sylvia.

2009-03-10T10:28:00.000-05:00

I whispered that in a lot of ears as a teenager. Just for fun.
"I am a Russian spy named Sylvia.."

I was going to tell you about the secret Russian spy mission that J and I went on years ago.. it involved Jackie Chan and Prince.. and death. But if I told you more than that, I'd have to reach through your computer and kill you. Till you died. So I won't do that. You're welcome. Enjoy living.

So, how y'all doing this Tuesday? I'm doing okay.. aside from, you know, the pain. (No, I'm not talking about some crappy 'womanly' pain or something.. geez.) I'm saying that I'm feeling the burn. Crap. That sounds like code for a yeast infection.. My muscles are sore, okay? Oy.

Yeah, I did some more of that exercise crap last night.. No, I'm not feeling energized (unless you count the extra motivation I'm feeling to lay on the couch and sleep..). But I did lose 2.5lbs! Well, if I can trust my scale anyway.. it's been known to LIE to me. But it said 157.5 this morning.. So there you have it.

The weather is like absolutely ripe for zombies. Just saying. Would not be surprised at all if one started banging on my walls and dropping body parts in my yard... Machete at the ready.

I totally had some stuff I was going to say today, but I forgot all of it. Because I'm awesome. And apparently as soon as I add that Random Thoughts Tuesday button into my post? a big flashing 'Bug the Crap Out of Me' sign starts blinking up over my head. That's what my kids do. Because they are awesome too. Kids are great. You should get some.

I am happy to report that Aidan has officially rejoined the Land of the Learning and gotten over.. whatever it was that was stuck up his butt. The teacher is coming today. I'm glad I have positive news for him.

Speaking of which, I should totally be cleaning my dining room right now and not blogging. But then, my kids should totally be working on math right now and not playing in their room (especially not playing in their room.. it's so filthy it's like a death trap.. Don't believe me? J and I refuse to come in there to tuck them in and give them hugs and kisses. We say goodnight at the door. We're afraid.). I guess it's hereditary.

Yesterday, Kieran says to me: I wish I wasn't alive. I asked him why, and he said: Because all I can think is that when I grow up, I'm going to kill my parents.
Leave it to my kids to go way beyond 'I hate you mommy!' I tell you.. future writers.

At least he's smart enough to keep us around until he grows up. Boy's gotta have someone to feed him. 'I'm married now.. no need for the parental unit.' *Shunk* (that's the sound of him using that machete.. in case you couldn't figure that out.. maybe I should put it away until I actually see a zombie..)

The end.

Operation Hot Chick

2009-03-09T16:27:00.000-05:00

Last night, I officially began this thing they call 'working out'. I'm not quite sure I get what all the hype is about. It made me breathe hard, made my heart pound, made my skin leak fluids, and now my muscles are all stiff and sore.. and stuff. Am I doing something wrong? Should I stop? Am I sick?

I might throw up...

Am confused.

I keep hearing all these things about it making one feel 'energized' and 'lose weight'.. I still weighed the same this morning.. and crap, am I tired.

Workout = FAIL.

Okay, okay.. I'll try again tonight.

*******************************************************

Have I mentioned I hate scales?

Current status..

Starting weight: 160
Current weight: 160
Weight loss goal: 30lb

(yep, I really did just put my actual weight on. my. blog. am awesome. hope we can still be friends, now that the mystery is gone..)

How do I get there?

Heh, heh... She said equipment.

We purchased My Fitness Coach for Wii and also have Wii Fit. I have committed to working out 6 days a week for 15-30min with the My Fitness Coach. I may toss in some Wii Fit with J now and then, and of course our weekend walks to the store will count as well. Once I reach 140lb, I plan to get myself a spiffy new suit, join the YMCA and start swimming again. By the time BlogHer rolls around, I'm gonna get me an awesome cocktail dress to celebrate and show off in.

Um... no. Next?

Hey, it's something to keep me busy and keep my mind off of the ABNA Contest.. and hopefully, something good will come of it. Right?

I'd rather be on the actual beach.

I will try to post my 'before' picture soon.. I haven't taken one yet.. not that I'm procrastinating on that at all..

Choose your own adventure..

2009-03-07T10:18:00.000-06:00

Okay so that title may be a tad misleading.. So I've started working on not one but two books. Writing two books at once is not what I would prefer to do though. I like to stick with just one at a time so that I can really devote myself to the characters and the story, that way it ends up being better developed in the end. So, I'd like your help. I'm going to post here the beginnings of both.. not much, really.. just snippets. But enough to give you a glimpse of what the story will be about. And if you ask nicely, I may post excerpts of my progress as I go along. While you all assist me with this, I'm going to work on my plot outlines this weekend so that whichever one I write, I know where I'm going with it.

Remember folks, these are first drafts.

******************************************************************
“I never thought we'd end up here..” he said softly, taking my hand as we sat together in the quiet and near empty waiting room. I looked down at our hands, fingers intertwined. The contrast of his dark skin on mine, so pale, made my vision blur and it was as if my world turned to black and white. Black and white, that's what we were, and that's what we thought this decision was. We felt like we had no choice. You do, said a small voice in my head.. Do I?

It wasn't something spur of the moment. It wasn't out of the blue. But rather, something that had built up inside both of us for years. Attraction. Intrigue. Longing. It built up to a point where it could no longer be denied, no matter how wrong or how inappropriate. Neither of us could hide our feelings from each other any longer. And so it began.

******************************************************************

“You're lying.” he said with a cold sadness in his eyes.
He was right. I was lying. Lying to him, lying to myself, lying to everyone.. and I had to stop. I couldn't do it anymore. I was miserable, and if I didn't get out now, I'd make everyone else miserable too. But I had no where to go. I had never felt so alone in all my life.

“I have to go.” I said quietly staring at my wringing hands, not wanting to look at him.
“Go where?” he asked, sounding suspicious and irritated.
“I don't know.. anywhere but here.” I answered.
And with that, I stood and walked out the door.

That was almost 2 years ago. And I never imagined I'd find myself here. I thought for sure I was destined to wander alone. I felt like I needed to be alone. Not for my own good, but for the good of everyone around me. I was certain that I was destined to hurt everyone I came into contact with. I felt toxic. So I left. But I suppose that's not really where the story begins. I didn't end up like that on my own, and I think that anyone who has known the pain of betrayal has a right to a certain amount of bitterness and cynicism. Yes, that's right, betrayal.

**************************************************************************
So? What do you think? Which one sounds more intriguing? Which one leaves you wanting to know more?

Favorite Music Friday - MxPx Edition 2

2009-03-06T10:12:00.000-06:00

Next installment of the announcement videos for 'On The Cover II':

And another one of my favorite videos:

You can skip this one.. because I suck today.

2009-03-05T13:00:00.000-06:00

So, I had pretty much decided I wasn't going to post today. See, my blog is supposed to be mostly for my real writing.. not that you all mind me posting a bunch of random crap (actually you seem to be enjoying that more.. hm), but whatever. Right?

Anyway.

I wanted to post something really awesome. Cause I feel like my blog kind of sucks lately. Like I'm just pulling stuff out of my ass and throwing it up there.. and what comes out of your ass? Shit. Yep, that's right.

Whatever.

I thought about posting today about the whole 'ChurchPunk' thing.. People ask me now and then about my 'name' and what it means and how can I be Christian and be a punk and all that crap.. But I just can't seem to sort it out and get it written. Know what I mean? It's kind of confusing and jumbled and stuff. I could make it into a list easier than I could make it into a blog post.. Maybe that's where I should start.

Yeah.

So why am I posting today? Ah, hell if I know. I'm bored, I guess. Shut up. No really, I just wanted to tell you all that I suck. I do. Why? I'll tell you why.

Because we're not going to see the Watchmen tomorrow. That's why. We've been looking forward to it for some time now.. Both of us have. And I was totally gonna finish the book (but as I told you on Tuesday.. yeah, not so much), and I was totally gonna get the house cleaned up so that we could have a sitter over.. But I didn't.

I suck.

My husband is very understanding about the suckitude. And I love him for that. But I still feel crappy about it. Not so much just over the whole Watchmen thing.. It's a movie, we'll see it eventually. It was a date.. we'll go on one sooner or later.. Maybe. I say that because the whole sucking thing is kind of a habit of mine. I'm pretty consistent actually. Oh well, someday I'll learn, right?

Meh.

Wordless Wednesday

2009-03-04T09:18:00.000-06:00

Almost but not quite 10 random things for Tuesday..

2009-03-03T08:37:00.000-06:00

So I finally started reading Watchmen, I'm not so sure I'll finish it by Friday. See, I have to clean my house too, so that we can get a sitter for our date. So between the house cleaning and the Watchmen reading.. I'm not so sure I'll finish (see there's all these little short people running around getting into trouble and stuff.. they get in the way of me getting done what I need to do. It's fun.. really.) But hey, we'll see..

This post is taking me a ridiculously long time to create.. between this, Twitter, IM conversations, and my kids.. oy. Some days you people just don't realize the effort.. nay, the *magic* that has to happen to keep this blog going! You're welcome.

As I mentioned yesterday, we have no TV. We currently have a computer that the kids can watch TV on.. Like this:

Okay, that picture is already outdated.. Last Friday we got a new flat screen monitor.. SO much better. But today? We get our new projector! (it's out for delivery right now.. so who knows, by the time I get this dang post finished, I may be playing Wii Fit.. and have lost a few pounds!) So, tonight is movie night in the ChurchPunkHouse.. and pot roast night. Crap! I need to get the pot roast started..

So my reading list is short this week.. the only one I'm committing to reading is Watchmen. That's easy right? Right.

Songs playing on my mp3 player (to drown out the baby crying who fell asleep in my arms and then woke up when I put her down all during the course of me typing up this post..):

Ninety Pound Wuss: Nostalgia
Ninety Pound Wuss: Perserverance
MxPx: Hidden Track (Teenage Politics)
Ninety Pound Wuss: Short Hand Operation
MxPx: I'm the Bad Guy
Emery: Story of a Man With a Bad Heart
MxPx: It's Alright
MxPx: Drowning
Flatfoot 56: Amazing Grace
Ninety Pound Wuss: Olympia
Emery: Rock-N-Rule
Slick Shoes: Now is The Time

So, are you going to BlogHer? You should. I'll be there. And my husband will be there. If you come, I'll have him make you tacos. No really. Tacos. You should come.

Oh, here's an award that I got from Pamela!!
Check her out, she's awesome. I'd pass it on.. but well, this post is getting a little crazy.. so perhaps another day. Oh, my brain hurts...

Speaking of MxPx, here is the next installment in the announcement videos for 'On The Cover II':

And since I miss doing 10 Things Tuesday, I'm going to add it in here.. So here is...

10 Things I Plan To Accomplish By the End of the Week:

clean the boys' room
clean the girls' room (again)
clean the bathrooms
teach my kids something
finish this post
do some Wii Fit
finish reading Watchmen
get the laundry put away
lose a pound or three
make sure J has clean underwear.

Okay, I have to go break up a fight over crackers...

Tacos + Beer = Wii Fit

2009-03-02T13:18:00.000-06:00

Last week, we made tacos. Not your 'Taco Bell box' tacos, but real tacos. And when I say 'we' I mean J. I just sit in the kitchen, watch him, drink beer, and look cute. I might even flash him a boob now and then when the kids aren't looking. What? You want good food? Entertain your chef.

Here's what was left after serving all the children and having a couple ourselves.. mmm. mmm. We finished them off today at lunch time. I would have cried, but I know my husband will make more.

Goes nicely with beans and a bag of Dole's Southwest Salad mix (our kids' favorite).

and of course, beer.

So, the husband is quite the stud. Have I mentioned that? Not only does he make a mean taco, he also can make a kick ass website. And? he's athletic too. What more can a girl ask for, right? He has taken advantage of several of the amenities at his place of business, such as: core training class, weight room, and free Taekwondo (spellcheck thinks I'm trying to spell Wonderbra..) classes. He also does soccer outside of work. His soccer career did not begin in his childhood, or even his teens for that matter. No, he started playing soccer when our second born (Kieran, for those of you playing along at home..) was just a wee bairn. Over the years, he's played off and on.. starting his own groups with church friends, playing in pick-up leagues and various indoor venues. He is currently playing indoor soccer.. or, more specifically 'futsol' (I really have NO idea how you spell that..).. or something like that. Anyway, for the first time in all his years playing, I (his lovely wife) actually graced the field with my presence (in other words: he was brave enough to let me and the little 'uns tag along to his game). It was lots of fun. And I even got to watch some of the game! That's him.. in the goal. No, he's not the ball.. He's the big, burly, bearded one with the mad ball blocking skills.

Yes, they did indeed win their game. And only one ball got past my studly man, thankyouverymuch.

So, being that I hate to be shown up, I've decided to get my flabby ass off the couch again and try to shed that last few baby pounds/winter coat. My weapon of choice? Wii Fit. Now, I've actually proven myself before with the Wii Fit.. but well.. we were using a projector (after abandoning our television) last summer/fall and the bulb burned out.. So, I was left hanging. (Don't worry, the kids didn't miss out on their cartoons.. we have an HP media PC which we run our cable tv through.) But, good news folks! We have a replacement projector on the way (one with much cheaper replacement lamps!), and I will no longer have an excuse for my flabbiness!

So, if I'm not around much in the future.. I'm busy trying not to fall off the Wii Fit board.. and if I'm around more than usual.. it means I'm washing away my feelings of defeat with a big tub of ice cream.. or something.

In the effort of full disclosure, I will try to get over my concern about scaring you all away and attempt to post a *gulp* 'before' picture.. or not.

Favorite Music Friday - MxPx Edition

2009-02-27T08:57:00.000-06:00

Ohmygosh I'm so excited I'm gonna throw up!!!!

Okay, just kidding.

But I really am excited.

You see, MxPx is going to have a new album out soon!! It's set to hit stores on March 24th and it's titled 'On The Cover II'. Yes, it's a cover album with lots of awesome songs and totally rad guest performers! MxPx is like.. well, they're like my favorite band.. and have been ever since Audio Adrenaline called it quits on me *cry* (it's okay guys.. I'll forgive you.. I guess.). Anyway, I'll stop boring you and let you check them out yourself.

Here's a video announcement about their upcoming album (you'll be seeing more of these over the next month.. cause I'm annoying like that.. WATHC THEM!):

And, because it is Favorite Music Friday.. I will also give you this.. This is the song I will be singing when they come to Des Moines (and they better come to Des Moines!!):

I apologize... well, not really.

2009-02-26T15:52:00.000-06:00

I really, really wanted to blog today. But had no idea what to post. So you get this. You're welcome.

Okay, that was kind of a lie.. I had something to post, but it got vetoed by my lurvly laptop which did not want to play nice with my camera. My husband can get them to cooperate (because he's just a genius, that one..), but when I get them together.. well, they're just all kinds of stupid. So I gave up. Sorry. I'll post it another day. After I can pry my little minions off the main computer and dump my camera on there. So there.

Some randoms for you:

"Mom?"
"Yes Torrin.."
"Do you know why I like blood?"
"Um.... no, why?"
"Because it's red."
"Oh.... Okay."

pbbbpppfffttt
"Did you toot Ellie?"
"No, I farted."
"Oh, I see. Is it stinky?"
"No, I'm a girl."
"So girl farts don't stink?"
"No, it was a pretty fart."
"I see. So do boy farts stink?"
"Yes. But I a girl."
"Yes you are. So your fart was pretty?"
"It was beautiful."
"Yes, Ellie. Your farts are beautiful."

"I'm going to wait until I need to poop.. so that I can make room in my stomach. Then I'm going to have some lunch."
"You already had lunch, Kieran. You ate a bagel and cream cheese."
"Oh. That's right. Then I'll have some breakfast."
"You already had breakfast too."
"I did?"
"Yes, you had a waffle."
"Oh... I am such a dork!"

**************************************************************
So, my camera broke. I had a Canon PowerShot S2 IS. It was nice. I was very happy with it. We had lots of good times together.. *sniff* I'm sad.

The Problem.

Notice how the lense is extended? Yeah. It won't go back in. Is stuck. Is broken. In the past, every time we've replaced a digital camera, we've upgraded. Sadly, not the case this time. It broke probably over a month ago.. Long enough that I don't remember. The kids swiped it (a regular occurrence round these parts..) and.. well.. they broked it.

This time? We didn't have money for a big fancy camera. And, after a few weeks without one *cry*, we decided to get a stand-in camera until my awesome husband can buy me a fancy new one (I may or may not have one picked out already.. oh hai Canon Rebel XSi DSLR.. *drool*). I am now the proud owner of a Canon PowerShot 790 Elph.

The Solution.

That Wordless Wednesday post down there?? I took that picture the day I got my new camera. Pretty good no? I thought so. That happy face? Yeah.. Torrin was excited about the camera too. My kids are all a bunch of show offs.. and if a camera comes out, all we hear is 'Take mah pitchur, take mah pitchur!' So yeah, no camera = no fun.

I swear, she's not as psycho as she looks..

So there you go.. That's about all I got today.. I promise I'll try harder next time..... Or maybe not. And now, I'm going to go do something mature... like dishes. Or not.

Wordless Wednesday

2009-02-25T08:41:00.000-06:00

In other news: Are you going to BlogHer? I really wanted to go to Steenky Bee's party in the Rockies.. but it's looking like BlogHer will end up being cheaper (not having to fly and all).. so I'm thinking that's the way to go (don't hate me Jen!). Anyway, I was wondering how many people I might 'know' who will be there.. I'm a bit shy and like to rally troops before hand to help with the courage... whiskey helps too.